It's got to make you wonder....

Special Superbowl Edition

2011-02-05T09:02:00.000-05:00

"Never will I leave you, nor forsake you" Hebrews 13:5

Wow, tomorrow is Superbowl Sunday and the Steelers are playing! How cool is that? Are you excited? Are you wearing black and gold? Did you go out and get some more Steelers gear just for the game? Can you sleep? The closer it gets, the more excited you get, right?

Well, it's kind of made me wonder.... What would the world be like if we were just as excited that Jesus is Lord as we are about the Steelers going to the Superbowl? I mean lets look at it realisticly...

Top Ten Reasons Jesus is Better than the Steelers...
     1. The Steelers are not God... but Jesus is.
     2. The Steelers have no idea who YOU are...... but Jesus does.
     3. The Steelers haven't SACRIFICED anything for YOU.... but Jesus did.
     4. The Steelers aren't a PERFECT ROLE MODEL for YOU... but Jesus is.
     5. The Steelers can't promise you ETERNAL LIFE... but Jesus can.
     6. The Steelers could care less what YOU think... but Jesus does.
     7.  The Steelers aren't there for YOU in your times of need... but Jesus is.
     8. The Steelers can't HEAL THE SICK... but Jesus can.
     9.  The Steelers have never asked you to put THEM before everything else... but Jesus did.
10. The Steelers (some of them at least) realize that God is more important than they are... and so should you.

I didn't go out and buy any new Steelers shirts... Oh, I was tempted.... but then I thought about it... what I already have will do.... I will be out there cheering on my team... I do so love the Steelers... but I am going to direct most of my enthusiasm to serving God. And anyway, He's a Steelers fan too....
        Dear Lord, thanks for just being you. Thanks for caring enough about us to send Your Son to take away our faults and sins. Thanks for being so forgiving. Thanks for helping us through our problems, even though we bring many of them on ourselves. Thanks for helping to pave the way for the Steelers to be in the Superbowl.   Thanks for letting this year be a year where the teams don't "hate" each other... but are respectful of each other, in the spirit of good sportsmanship. Please help to remind us that You are more important than our favorite sports teams. Please help us to remember that anything that we make more important than You in our lives, takes you out of that top spot that you so deserves. I know that I do that at times... and I am trying to keep you up front and foremost in my life.... Thanks for being there to help with that....

2011-01-07T08:00:00.001-05:00

"Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled: “Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 15:54-57

As I was Facebook Stalking today I saw a post from a friend that said that it was just one year today that her father died and went to be with God and her mother. It reminded me that in exactly one week it will be a year since my own Dad died. Throughout the past year I have had many ups and downs as I have remembered him. I have learned many things.

1. No matter how good or bad your relationship is with your parent; you will still miss them. No matter what the relationship was like, there will always be both good and bad memories. You choose what you want to remember. As for me, I am choosing to remember the good times.

2. No matter how much it hurts, the pain will eventually lessen. I didn't say it would go away, but it WILL eventually lessen.

3. Life goes on. It might be different, but it still goes on, and you must too.

4. We are never alone in our pain. God is always right there with us, even if we don't see Him.

5. Our help comes from the Lord. Even if you feel like you have lost your safety net; you haven't. Parents can only help and support so much... our real help and support comes from God.

6. The hard times make us stronger. And God uses the hard times to teach us. Many times we eventually see benefits from working through the hard times. God sometimes uses the hard times to bring us together and to heal wounds that have gone too long without healing.

7. Life is short. Sometimes it feels like it goes on forever, but it wasn't that long ago that we were young and here we are today....

8. We are here for a reason. When the Bible says that God "knew the plans He had for us" it implies that God has a plan for our lives. That would imply that we are here for a specific purpose. We need to go to Him and seek our purpose. Ask what He would have us do... and then ask His help in doing it.

9. It all comes back to number 5. Our help comes from the Lord.

In The World

2010-12-31T08:00:00.000-05:00

"Guide me in your truth and teach me, for You are God my Savior, and my hope is in You all day long." Psalm 25:5
     Have you ever felt like you just weren't strong enough to go out into the world? Have you felt like you just wanted to hang with your friends from Church because they believe what you believe? Yeah, I admit it. Sometimes I do feel like that... It's safe. It's easy. It's comfortable.
      But if we only hung out with our friends from Church and didn't venture out into the real world, then who would we share God with? Who would really ever get the chance to see how God is working in our lives? How would our churches grow? How would anyone who didn't believe ever get the chance to see how God is molding and changing our lives?
      Yeah, I know... sometimes it doesn't really feel like we have changed.... and sometimes we think that we would be poor examples of someone who is giving their life to God, but yet they see it... sometimes I think they see it more clearly than we do... only they don't always know what it is..... We need to be out in the world. We need to be in the world and yet not of it....
       What does that really mean? I have a rather vague idea of it... I think it means that we must build relationships outside of church. Relationships with people who don't put God first. Relationships where we can build a trust with the other person that will allow them to get to know us. We don't have to push God on them. But we will need to share that we trust God and count on Him to guide and direct our lives. They should be able to see that God is most important to us by how we live our lives.
       We should not be living in a giant conflict of interest... we should live our lives governed by what God wants. It's not a show. We aren't supposed to be out there acting holy or anything, but if we are doing God's will in our lives, we will make honest, noble decisions in our day to day lives. We will seek to do right and not to take shortcuts. We will be faithful friends who treat others with respect and really care for them. This will be noticed by others.
        They will know that "something" is different about you. They will know that you really do care, and that it is not a fake caring like so many others do... God will guide you in how to care for others if you only let Him.
        Dear Lord, please help me to be a light to someone. Please help me to live my life in such a way that others will see You working in my life. That they will see Your love when they see me. Help me to be a true and faithful friend to someone. To truly care. To truly reach out and share You with them. Help me to not hide in the shadows of my church but to go out into the world and to reach out with Your guidance to share Your love and Your word with others. Help me to be a light that they might see You shining brightly inside me.... and please help my friends to do the same. My faith is in You... My hope is in You... and my trust is in You.

A Very Special Gift

2010-12-24T08:00:00.004-05:00

"Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel." Isaiah 7:14

Thousands of years before the birth of Christ, the prophet Isaiah prophesied about His birth. How did he know. That alone should be enough to prove that Jesus was indeed the long awaited Messiah.

God prepared the way. Prepared the way for us to recognize His Son when He arrived on earth. If only people had listened to God's word and taken heed, they would have known who He was right away. John the Baptist recognized Him. Would you recognize Him?

I am awed when I think about the birth of Jesus. Just the fact that God would send His own Son into the world to atone for the bad things that we have done and that we will do. I know that I have done a lot of bad things. I know that I will probably continue to do bad things as long as I live. I will not want to do bad things, but indeed I will still do them.

I am amazed that God spoke to people even back then and that they listened. They did what He asked of them. I know that it must not have been easy for either Mary or Joseph to do as God commanded. I know that many folks today don't think that having a child before marriage is a bad thing but imagine what it was like back then.... I mean couldn't they like stone you to death for stuff like that? And then Joseph married her knowing that it was not his son he would be raising. Imagine the love that they both must have had for that child.

I know that I have known what it was to be an unwanted child. I know the pain that being raised like that could cause. And I have always believed that those children who find themselves adopted into families are really the most loved children in the world. Why? Well that is easy... because the parents "chose" to adopt them. They chose to bring a child into their home and to love that child and raise it as their own.

I know that Jesus was not adopted. But still Mary and Joseph made a conscious decision to bring that child into the world and to raise Him as their own. Like most adoptive parents they probably wrestled with the decision of when to tell Him the truth about his birthright, but knowing that God would call Him just as He had called them, they probably told Him quite early. The love that they must have felt for that child must have been overwhelming. I wonder if they were aware of the sacrifice that He would one day make for you and me and all of mankind? After all that too was foretold in Isaiah and many other places in the old testament.

Christmas has always been a very special time for me. It has never been a "commercial" holiday for me. It has always been celebrated quietly, behind closed doors.... just reading the story of Jesus' birth and pondering the gift that God gave to all of us on that day that Jesus was born. I would have to agree that Jesus is indeed the "reason for the season".

Merry Christmas to everyone and a very special Birthday to Jesus

God Has Our Back

2010-12-17T08:00:00.003-05:00

"Have not I commanded you? Be strong, vigorous, and very courageous. Be not afraid, neither be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

In the office where I work we have a Christmas Tradition. We give gag gifts to our co-workers. We search all year for just the right gag gift. Something that embodies the person and yet makes everyone laugh. Usually it is in reference to the "absolutely worst" part of your job.... and yes... it usually makes you laugh too....

Well, last year our Grants writer got me good. He gave me a bin pin that said "2010 already sucks". It was funny because it was pretty much right on as the beginning of the year is always a nightmare for me as that is when I have to close out the grants. It is usually a mad dash to spend any remaining funds before the drop dead date. So for the first few days I wore that pin everywhere... even to church... it was a joke..... it was cute... but it became much too true to remain a joke. Shortly into the new year my dad died and then it just got worse from there. Needless to say I took the pin off and have not put it back on...

During much of the year I have isolated myself from everyone around me.... I have not wanted to bring anyone else down. I think that for the most part I am still doing that but I have let a few folks back in.... not many though.... But yes it has been a long and lonely year.

It would be so easy to say that God had abandoned me during times when my life just seemed to stink.... but it would be a lie. Because, you see... I have not been walking through this alone. God has never left my side..... Oh, there have been many times where I have not seen His touch in my life. Many times where I felt alone and abandoned. There were times where I would not hear Him or feel Him in my life. But yet He was always there.... waiting for me..... Hindsight is a wonderful thing isn't it? It's easy to look back now as I do a "Year In Review" kind of thing on my life - and to see how He was there working in my life and I didn't even see Him. Yep. That's it exactly.

There are so many places in the bible where God tells us that He will not abandon us.... David speaks of that so many times in the Psalms.... and yet in many other places in the Psalms he is unable to see God working in his life, and He asks God "where are You?". The pure and simple truth is that God IS always with us. He NEVER leaves us. We just sometimes take our eyes and our minds off of Him and forget to look to Him.

Maybe sometimes we put blinders on (kind of like putting on sunglasses at night). The same things are out there.... they are already hard to see because it's dark out, but you have even more trouble seeing them because of the sunglasses. The sunglasses are kind of like when we get all bummed out because of the circumstances of our lives. The circumstances are there. They are not going away (at least not by our power)... but if we take our eyes off of God and look to ourselves or others to fix the circumstances it will never happen. We just can't do it. God is there. He may or may not fix the circumstances, but if you wait for Him, and follow the lead that He gives you, He can surely navigate your way around or through the circumstances.

Dear Lord, thanks for always having my back. Even when I didn't realize I had a back. Thanks for being with my friends when they need you and can't see you working in their lives. Thanks for forgiving us when we forget that you are always there. Dude, You just rock!"

Cheers and Tears....

2010-11-26T08:00:00.021-05:00

"But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 15:57

   This is the time of year when we reflect upon everything that we are thankful for. I guess that is a good thing. This is also, now and forevermore the beginning of a season of missing those that are no longer with us. But that should not stop us from being thankful.
   I am writing this blog on the Monday before Thanksgiving. You will probably be reading this either the day after or a few days after... The day after Thanksgiving (Black Friday) will be the day that my mom, sisters, brothers - in - law, nieces, and nephew go to the cemetery to visit my Dad and have our first ever graveside memorial service. My mom and sister have picked out a few bible verses for us to read, and then we will share a few memories. I am thinking this will be a very tearful day...Maybe we ought to invest in kleenex..... Yet even this event makes me thankful.... sad, but overwhelmingly thankful....
   Did you catch the part about my mom and sister picking out bible verses to read? Oh yeah! They did! Amazing.... I didn't think my mom even knew what the inside of a bible looked like....
   I just thought that it would be nice if I shared with you some of the things that I am thankful for:
   I am thankful that God loved us enough to give up that which was His so that we may be able to call ourselves His Children...
   I am thankful that God has enough love to go around, and enough patience to put up with us at our worst...
   I am thankful that He has saved my life because surely without His presence in my life I would not be here today...
   I am thankful that He takes care of my needs and that even though I still do worry about them at times, I really don't need to...
   I am thankful that God has led me to a Church that has become like a family to me, and that He has used the people there to interact in my life and be living examples of His love and patience and forgiveness. And that He has used them to help me to grow in Him...
   I am thankful that out of great sadness and loss, came a family brought together like never before...
   I am thankful for friends who are willing to overlook my human failures to get to know the me that Gods trying to mold me into...
   I am thankful to have found my calling to serve God, and to be able to put to use the talents that He has given me to serve Him and give Him honor...
   I am thankful that He has allowed me to see my dream of getting an education fulfilled. And that hopefully He will use it for His glory...
   I am thankful that I have been able to see God working in the lives of others at times where I could not see Him working in my own life, and that it kept me aware that He is here and working in our lives...
   I am thankful for Chocolate Pudding....
   I am thankful for so much that I could literally go on and on but it would get redundant...
   Dear Lord, I am so thankful that I can call you Father, and that You think of me as Yours. I am thankful for all that You have done in my life and in the lives of those I love. I am thankful that You have brought me people whom I can love and care for... And I am thankful for those whom You have used to show me how to love like that.... I am still learning. I am a slow learner.... but I am also thankful Your patience with me as I keep messing it up time and time again.... Yes, there are sad times. Yes I have been crying up a storm lately.... You really did make an unlimited amount of tears didn't You? But at the same time through my pain, You have brought back some really good memories that I had long forgotten. Painful to remember, yes... but they bring a smile to my heart.... So as I go out there Friday morning to remember.... I will be thankful for those memories... and for the chance to share them with my family.... thanks....

The "Do-Over"

2010-11-19T08:00:00.003-05:00

"They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."    Acts 2:42-47

         I heard a song for the first time on the radio the other day.... I don't mean I never heard a song on the radio before, but I had never heard this song before.   It was a new song by J. J. Heller called "Love Me". You may have heard it. Anyway I was just dumbfounded because the song said (almost word for word) something that I had said in this very blog only a few weeks ago...."Who will love me for me? Not for what I have done or what I will become. Who will love me for me?" Wow that song really struck a chord with me... because I have been just having those very same thoughts so much lately.
         I grew up thinking that love was a conditional thing... if you do what your parents want you to do they might love you. If you screw up, they stop loving you.... but that is not really love.   God loves us totally unconditionally. He loves us so much that he gave up His own son, to save our lives.   He loves us so much that He gives us a "do-over" every single day.... How many people do you know who would be willing to give you a "do-over" every day? Yeah, there is a beer commercial on television that jokes about that.... but it's true. Only God is willing to be that patient with our mistakes... people aren't.
         I have been pretty much of a hermit this year. I haven't gone out with friends much... I have a few good friends. Really good friends. Friends who do love me for me... and not for what I've done, or what I will be.... and I have been blessed to have been able to just hang with them.... even sometimes to just sit and watch tv with them.   We sometimes have deep discussions but we don't have to.... It is just awesomely refreshing to just be with them. And I think that they know how special they are to me, and not because of what they do or will be. They have become like family for me and I am so very very blessed by them.
         I have other friends whom I care about very very much. I don't know what it is, but I just really like them. Not for who they are, or what they have done, or what they will do, but just because I do... I can't explain it... They know who they are.... These are the folks whom I may have reached out to and called... maybe invited them to have a cup of coffee or a meal or a movie or shop or whatever... just reached out to to try to spend a little time just hanging with them.... I don't ask often, and mostly because it's hard to have people say "not today" or "maybe next week" but next week never comes.... and then you wonder.... do they love you for you or for what you do... or for who you've been.... or for what you will do...
     Anyway enough about that.... the thing is.... God made us for fellowship.   He made us part of communities of people who live for Him.   The book of Acts tells about how God blessed the followers who joined together to praise Him. To worship Him. They broke bread together. They prayed and praised God.   They were like a family.   It really seemed like they saw each other more than just Sundays and Wednesday nights.   And God blessed them greatly.   It's got to make you wonder....
       Dear Lord, thanks for the "Do-Overs".   I really need them.   Realizing that You do that for me has really made a difference for me.   I am very thankful for that. I am also thankful for Your totally unconditional love.   I am still learning what that means.   It is still so very hard to comprehend... but thanks... and thanks for putting people in my life that love me and that I can love... and please help me to love unconditionally too..... Thanks.....

My Help Comes From The Lord

2010-11-12T08:00:00.002-05:00

" My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:2

   As you probably already know, this has been a pretty rough year for me personally. It started out about a year ago with the deaths of some people who were a very important part of my life. It continued to get tougher as my dad battled a terminal lung disease and died in January. Within a week of his dying two more people whom had played an important part in my life also died. And then my friends parents started to die.... and then a reprieve for a few months and suddenly this fall it started to repeat.... people who were an important part of my life began to suddenly die.... it seems like between relatives and friends I was losing someone about every two weeks. You might think you get used to it.... but you never really do.... each time that it happens again I feel like someone has yanked my heart right out of my chest. It's kind of like a primal reaction. Because in my head I know that God has the big plan and I really do believe that He takes us to be with Him once we have done whatever He had planned for us to do on earth, but yet even though I know that it is still hard. The initial hours after I first learn of the death of someone I care about are the hardest. In those first few hours I feel like I revert to the old me.... looking for something to make it better..... like that's really gonna happen..... and I kind of reach out for help... but it's never really there..... "our help comes from the Lord".... literally. He is the only one who can help us in those times even if we (in our humanness) reach out elsewhere....
   I think that maybe the reason for the hard year might be to teach me to turn to Him first, and not as an afterthought. During much of my day to day dealings I do indeed turn to Him first. And yet, in those very troubling times I have realized that I have not always done the same. I was driving to work today and I realized that I missed my Dad. Missed him. Really missed him. If you had asked me just a few years ago if I even thought that would be possible; I would have laughed. We did not have a great relationship. In fact I was much closer to his little brother than I was to him. But this morning I realized that we really did have some good times. Not many, but there were some.... and I had hidden them away but now God has brought them out and put them front and center.... and tears were falling... from everywhere ( well not really, but there were a lot of them...).
   I was thinking back to everyone whom I have lost this year.... I'm going to miss them all... I was thinking about that.... and then I wondered if I were to die, would anyone miss me? And how would they remember me? What would they remember about me? Would it be the "old" me? or the "newer" me? Would they even know that I am living for Christ? Would they think of me as someone who depended on God or on everyone else? but then again, do I really even care what they think? Have you ever wondered those very same thoughts?
   So I guess that today is all about putting God first. Turning to Him first. Letting Him do His stuff... and waiting for Him to do the healing..... and not worrying about tomorrow.... cause He's gonna have that too.... It's hard to talk about these failings of mine, but I'm figuring some of you have them too..... (at least I hope I'm not the only one....) but if you also have those failings, you don't need to share em with me.... share them with Him.... and then let Him do His stuff....
   Dear Lord, I have opened my heart. I have poured out my pains, and my failures..... please forgive me for not coming to You first..... for sometimes treating You like sloppy seconds..... please help me to go to You first. To put my faith in You and You alone... and to help me to patiently wait for You in Your time. Please help me to remember that You've got the plan...and You know how to use it.... Thanks for being there with me through all of this, even when I didn't turn to You. And thanks for loving me enough not to leave me now.... I don't deserve you, but I am glad I have You.

Letter to a friend...

2010-11-05T12:00:00.000-04:00

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." John 13:34

My Dear Friend,
   I am writing to let you know that you have been on my heart and in my mind as of late. I watch you struggling to deal with some problems and my heart breaks for you. It is actually painful to see you hurting and not be able to fix things for you, to help to make it better. You have many issues going on right now, some physical, some spiritual and some just, well just some other stuff.... and you are dealing with them. I wanted to let you know that I am praying for you. A lot. Regularly, as I go through my day.
   The guy upstairs and I, well we talk a lot about how you're doing... He's got it covered. He keeps trying to assure me of that. He keeps trying to assure you of it too.... Funny how it sounds so safe when He says it, and then a few minutes later, there we go trying to step in and fix things ourself anyway... like we could do it any better..... yeah right....
   Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone as you deal with what you have to deal with.... I would like to be there with you... but that wouldn't be the right thing... after all, I've kind of got a lotta "stuff" of my own going on right now too... and I don't want you to have to try to bring me up.... We need to look to God. And not just to look to Him. We need to let Him do His "stuff".... after all His "stuff" is much better than any of the "stuff" that you and I can do....
   Sometimes when I look in the mirror, I don't like what I see.... but I have to remind myself that I am only seeing the outer shell... it's what's inside that counts.... sometimes I am not so sure that I like the inside either.... it's easy to feel that way.... it's our human nature.... we listen to the wrong voices.... It's kind of like that Casting Crowns song "The Voice of Truth"... it says that we need to listen to the "voice of truth".... I think that there is much truth in that.... God made us. He likes us, inside and out.... are we perfect like He is? No, we're not. But... He likes us anyway! In spite of our imperfections.... God is the "Truth". We need to really listen for His voice, the voice of truth.... If He sees the good in us, then we need to see it too.... after all, it's there, even if we have a hard time seeing it....
It's much easier for us to see the good in others than it is to see it in ourselves... Yeah I know that some folks are really critical of others, but forget them.... most folks aren't like that... they see the good in others much easier than one would imagine.
   I see the good in you. I believe that you are full of goodness and beauty and that you shine God's light.... I see Him working in your life, even when you don't see Him. He is there with you and I just wanted to point that out to you, so that in case you missed it....well.... you know.... it's got to make you wonder....
   Dear Lord, This letter could have been written to any one of my friends. It was not directly written to one, but to several... many of my friends are struggling with trials large and small, physical, mental, spiritual, or just life stuff..... I pray for all of them daily, but then You know that already.... We speak of them often.... You brought them into my life. You taught me how to love them.... You know that I am not so good at giving love.... but you know that I care so very much.... So if you could just keep being with them like you always are.... and maybe if you could ease up on em a bit and bring them some joy... that would be a really cool thing.... and could you give em a hug from me.... thanks....

Beauty in God's Eyes...

2010-10-29T08:00:00.001-04:00

     "To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified."           Is 61:4

        What is beauty? That is a question that has been discussed at a women's retreat that I have been attending this weekend. It is also a subject to which I have given very little thought over the years...
         They gave us each a rose. They asked us to take some quiet time and study the rose. To really look at it and to see what makes it beautiful. They asked us to ponder that. This is a little tough for a girl who never really found much joy in flowers. But I tried. I looked at that rose and I didn't immediately see anything.   So I prayed. I asked God to show me the beauty in the rose and to make it "knock me on my behind" sure of why it is beautiful. So then God did open up my eyes. I saw that the rose was kind of like us. Beautiful because God made it. All roses look alike, but if you look closely you will see that each rose is just a tiny bit different from the next. Not really obvious changes but small subtle ones. They are also very fragile. Easy to bruise, much like we are.... and the stems on the roses have thorns that protect them.
   We are all made in God's eyes. We are all beautiful to him. I know that often I don't like what I see when I look in the mirror. But yet God likes me just the way I am... So then I have to look deeper, beyond the flesh and into my soul, my very being... and I realize that I must try to see myself as God sees me... it's very difficult to do... and I can't do it on my own... can you?
   It is easier to see the beauty in other people. They may be too fat, too thin, too old, too young, it doesn't really matter does it? We know that they are flawed and we can overlook those flaws because we can see God in them.... wouldn't it be cool it we could see God in us too? He is.... I just know He is....
   I have had a really stinky year. I see no signs that it will improve anytime soon.... and yet... I have seen God's hand at work in my life this year. I know that I could not have handled everything that has happened even just a few years ago. Back then I would have tried to "handle" everything myself.... but this year was different. I knew that it was too much for me... I just gave it all to God and said "I can't" but You can.... and He was there.... the bad stuff was the ashes, and out of the ashes God worked.... that was the beauty rising out of the ashes....
   Yet just because I gave the problems and bad stuff up to God, doesn't mean it didn't hurt... I still find myself balling my eyes out cause I miss my dad, as I drive down the road; and I didn't even have a good relationship with him while he was alive... I spent most of my life afraid OF him, and then towards the end God changed all that and I became afraid FOR him.
   We have all heard the saying "no pain; no gain." Well it looks like there is some truth to that old saying.... it's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, only you can really define what is beautiful and what is not. Please help us to not be so critical of ourselves. Please help us to see how You work in our lives and how You love us in spite of ourselves. And maybe just maybe we could see a bit of that beauty without all the pain? Please?

Miracles Happen Every Day

2010-10-22T08:00:00.004-04:00

"God is my Strength. "I love you, Lord, You are my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my Savior. My God is my rock in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me and my place of safety. I called on the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and He saved me from my enemies."   Psalm 18:1-3

       Did you watch the rescue of the 33 miners from the mine collapse in Chile. Wow. What a miracle to be able to get them out alive.   And not just that, they were looking pretty healthy for having been stuck underground for such a long time. How could anyone not see God's hand in that?
       I am not sure if everyone realized that God was watching over those guys and protecting them from what would have been certain death in a lot of cases.   I watched that rescue knowing that I knew that I knew...
       Miracles happen every day... God is with us all the time, there protecting us from the things that we don't even realize we need protection from... Guiding us, nudging us... just being with us...
      Let me tell you a story of how God guides and directs us in ways that aren't always so obvious.   I am at a women's retreat this weekend.   I wasn't planning to go... I had been in a not so good place... I was really missing my Dad and was just not feeling too much like being with people... I had even take a week off from Church and headed to Ohio to visit with a cousin whom I just love to hang out with... and don't see often enough...   But anyway we were at Home Depot buying some paint when I got an E-mail on my blackberry asking if I would work the video for the retreat. I wasn't planning on going.   In fact I wasn't even planning on answering the e-mail. But then a friend who was cc'ed on the email sent back a response and kind of volunteered me to be going... I still wasn't planning on being there... and I still didn't answer for a few weeks. I really had to pray about it. Eventually God convicted me to go.   So I sent the response. At the time no one else from my Church was planning to go that I knew of... A few weeks later a friend from church said that she might go... That was cool.   But anyway, as I prepared for the weekend I was still not sure why I was going but I knew that God wanted me to be there....   Anyway here I am.   And God is beginning to show me the signs that YES He wanted me to be there.... As I was waiting to get registered an old friend arrived. I had been supposed to travel a bit with this friend earlier in the year but we just never got to it.... (Life happened). But I realized at that moment that I had really missed the time with this friend. This friend is one of the people who helped me to realize that God was calling me to blog.   And as I looked at my friend walking up the walkway, I saw her see me and I could see that she was as glad to see me as I was to see her.   I am not really too used to people being glad to see me so that was nice. As we got a chance to sit and catch up last night we realized that we had both been in the same dumpy place and God had called us to be here. He engineered it. We both listened when He called, to go where He called us to go; even though we had no real desire of our own to go. And he blessed us for listening.   And it gets better yet...
       You know how I have spent years doing disaster work... well right before Hurricane Katrina hit in 2005 I was deployed to Alabama to wait for it... Once it hit I was dispatched to Bay St. Louis, Mississippi for two weeks. After that two weeks I returned home for a bit before heading back to New Orleans...   But the speaker from this retreat was from Bay St. Louis..... is that wild or what....   See God takes us places in our lives.... He gives us experiences and then He uses them to teach us.... I wasn't even walking with God when I was at Hurricane Katrina.... I was running away from Him... but He used that... Miracles happen every day... we often don't even notice them.... it's got to make you wonder....
      Dear Lord, thanks for being patient with me when I put the blinders on... thanks for gently pulling them away from my eyes and letting me see Your hand in my life.... You are so great, so awesome, so loving that I just can't even fully grasp Your greatness. I am humbled by your sheer magnificance. Thanks for loving me, and my friends and for watching over us and protecting us and just for being there.....

Did I hear you right?

2010-10-15T08:00:00.003-04:00

"If ... they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry."
   Ex 22:23

   Do you ever feel as if people aren't really listening to what you say? I just hate that. It burns me up. But truth be told, I do it to other people too. I try to listen but somehow the words just fade away and it sound like "BlahBlahBlahBlah". It's kind of like the sound that Charlie Brown's parents and teachers make in the "Peanuts" cartoons. You do know what I mean don't you? I mean, you do it too, don't you? I sure hope that I am not the only one.... No, I know I am not the only one.
   The bible tells us to pray without ceasing. To pray is to talk to God. The bible also says that if we talk to God, that God will hear our prayers. He never hears "BlahBlahBlahBlah", but instead He hears our words, and the meaning of the words in our heart. He hears our prayers even when we don't have the words to express what we want to say. How great is that! God stops what He is doing. He gives each and every one of us His fullest attention. He hears our cries. All of them. God does not selectively listen.
   We talk about listening for the still quiet voice of God in our lives and yet we can't even listen to the not so quiet voices of those whom we call friends. My pastor told us in church on Sunday that we need each other. That God puts people in our lives to be our support system, to help us to stay on track and focused on God. But if we aren't hearing these folks, aren't we disrespecting God in a way.... I mean if He put them here for us, and we blow them off, well......
   Plus it really hurts when you know that you have told someone something and then they seem to have no idea of what you are talking about the next time you see them.... and you know you told them.....
   I am guilty of this too. I will try to be a better listener. I mean, how can I hear God's voice if I can't even hear the voices of those whom He has put close to me. After all; sometimes their words ARE His words...it's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, please help me to quiet my soul and listen, really listen to those around me. Help me to listen to them the way that You listen to me. And help me to not feel hurt when those around me don't do any better at listening than I do.... Thanks.

You've Got To Love That Competitive Spirit

2010-10-08T08:00:00.002-04:00

"I can do all things through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

   It's football season again. I can feel the blood tingling through my veins. My heart is racing. I can't wait for next weekend to watch some more games. I don't even care who is playing. It's football. It's great. I just love football. I am playing in two fantasy football leagues this season and they just make watching the games even more enjoyable. I am very competitive. I like to win. I don't have to win. I certainly enjoy winning more than losing, but my joy doesn't come from the win. Instead, it comes from the competitive nature of the game.
   I think that sports and games of all kinds are great fun because they bring out the competitive nature in me. I really try to do my best at each and every game I play. I enjoy watching games where people are really trying to do their best. Kind of weird huh? Unbiblical you say? Relying on self? Trying to be better than others? I don't think so. Let me explain....
   If, as the bible say "I can do all things through Him who gives me strength" then I should be good at everything I do.... logically that would make sense, but we are human and not alway really good at everything. However, If we do everything that we do to the glory of God, then wouldn't we always strive to do our very best. Even knowing that we might not win. Might not be the best there is. But at least we are giving the best we have. I see sports kind of like that... I might not be the best softball player in the world. But if I give it everything I have. And if I play a good clean game, with no cheating or hard feelings. and if I give God the glory if I do well, and don't get down if i don't do so well... Then haven't I honored God in what I have done.
   I believe that God wants us to be the best we can be. That He wants us to give our all in all that we do. I believe that He wants us to understand that we can't be the best on our own, but only through Him. Now I am not saying that we should pray to win.... that just seems so wrong.... but rather, that we should pray that we play fair, and give it all that we have to give.
   If you look around, there are Christians in professional sports who are out there sharing their faith with others and inspiring our youth. They are being a positive witness for Christ. They give all they have. They know that they are only able to be where they are by the grace and blessing of God. And all they do, they do for His glory.
   Competition is good folks. As Christians we are not called to let others win. We are called to do our very best in all we do. To give all. To be the tool. It is a witness to His glory. So in that vein, I will go out there and play my fantasy football. I will do my very best to win week after week after week. And no matter how it goes, I will have given my all, and I will have enjoyed the competition. Praise the Lord. It's got to make you wonder.
   Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to give our all. To try to do our very best for you in all that we do. Help us to engage in healthy competition, but not to take it to heart if we win or lose. And help our good natured competitive attitude be a shining light to others as they see our love for You in all we do.

Did you say you have "spiritual diarrhea?"

2010-10-01T08:00:00.000-04:00

"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash." Matthew 7:24-27

   Lets talk about diarrhea a bit. Have you ever had diarrhea? Let me tell you it is not fun. Diarrhea is what happens when your body is full of stuff that is not solid... (Well that is a simplified explanation but it will suffice for our purposes...) If you want to prevent diarrhea they say that Pepto-Bismal is the thing to take. If you already have it, then they say that Immodium is a good solution.... OK. Fine, you say, but what does that have to do with the verse above?

   Have you ever had "spiritual" diarrhea? "Spiritual" diarrhea would be when your full of so called "spiritual" stuff that is not solid.... by solid, I mean not solid in the word. It would be akin to your house not being built on the rock but on sand instead. Spiritual diarrhea can be prevented by a diet heavy in the word of God and quiet time spent with Him. If spiritual diarrhea is already happening, the cure would include the same thing as the prevention. A diet heavy in the word, and more time alone with God.

   A steady regular diet of the word is good for a lot of things.... it's kind of like "chicken soup" for the soul... (I hope that whoever coined that phrase doesn't go after me for using it...) You can never get too much of it... If a little is good... a lot is better.... Just listening to people talk about God is not always a good thing. You must read the word and know it so that you can evaluate what those who teach you are saying. What they are teaching should be backed up by the word. If it is not then we ought not be listening to them. If we know the word, really know it... then we can weed out the bad..... Our foundation will be strong. Our house will be built upon the rock.

   Dear Lord, thank You for giving us the word. Thank You for allowing Your Holy Spirit to dwell within us to help us to understand the word. Thank You for how the Holy Spirit helps us to discern the words of our teachers and to seek their foundation in Your word. Thanks for that smack upside the head when we finally get it.... and for always showing us something new in passages that we may have read over and over and over again...

Taking our eyes off ourselves....

2010-09-24T08:00:00.008-04:00

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Hebrews 13:5

   This has been a tough year. Actually a tough two years. But the worst of it has been from about a year ago through now... I have had to really depend on God to get me through each and every day.... Each day has been a struggle in it's own special way... I have stayed busy. God has shown me that it helps to take my eyes off of my own problems and keep them on wherever He has taken me. It has not been easy. There are many days where I don't want to get out of bed in the morning... but I do. Other days I can't wait to get off work so that I can crawl back into bed.... I can't tell you the last time I had someone over to my place.... I can tell you that I have not been alone. God has been there with me every day, every moment of each day. I have not always felt His presence, yet I have always known He was there.
   I know that many of you have also had a rough year. No picnic for sure. It is hard to give to others when you feel like you are in need yourself. And yet, we do.... that is what keeps us going.... it is how we serve God, by being there for others, even when we would rather roll up on the sofa and hide.
   Sometimes serving brings us joy. If you like children, you might be blessed by being able to teach Sunday School, or by helping a friend babysit. If you like to cook, you might be blessed by being able to cook for people in your home or at an event. If you're like me, and you're not a people person, you might be blessed by being able to do computer work or office work that helps others.
   Still we must remember that acts aren't all that important in God's eyes. Acts are something that we might "want" to do because we want to serve. We should not be looking for recognition or acceptance because of "what" we do.
   Lately I have had several people say that they were thankful for the things that I do. It kind of puts me off. I don't do "things" so that people will be thankful, I don't want people to be willing to keep me around because I am useful.
   I was with a friend the other day and this friend called someone else whom I am also friends with. They were on speaker phone and somewhere during the conversation it came up that I was there with that friend that day and then this friend asked the other person if they wanted to say hello to me, the other person said "oh, well I guess I have to now." I don't think they knew they were on speaker. Wow, that really stung. I hadn't realized... I have really been thinking about that a lot this week. It hurt. A lot. But I am reminded that when we let people into our lives we allow not only the joy that they bring but also the pain that they will also bring. When we open our hearts we let in both the good and the bad. Everyone whom we let into our lives will eventually hurt us. They probably won't mean to. But it will happen. Just as we will hurt them (we may have already hurt them without even realizing). Love, real true love is being able to get over it. To know that it will happen and to not push them away. To see the imperfections in people and to say "so what".... to be able to push the imperfections inside and see the heart of the person.
   I want people to want to know me because they just like having me around. I know I am not a particularly friendly person. I know I can be pretty darn hard to like. But I do have a heart for God. And I am a loyal friend to those whom I think of as family. I have tried to be there for you guys. And I have been most especially thankful for those of you who have been there for me. I hope that I have not been too much of a drain on anyone. I am still working daily to take my needs to God and not to my friends. It is a constant work in progress. A daily struggle. If I have neglected anyone I apologize, but I have been kind of deep in thought a lot lately. I know I am rambling. I'm gonna go.
   I may soon take a break from this blog to get my head together. I will let God lead in that. If He continues to bless me with something to write; then I will continue to write. I don't want you to have to read MY ramblings, but rather HIS words.
   "Dear Lord, Thanks for everything. Thanks for always being there. Thanks for getting us through the hard times, and not just leaving us to fend for ourselves. And thanks for bringing people into our lives that live YOUR word. And please continue to use us to do YOUR will. I am thankful that at least You know the plans You have for us...."

Are you my mother?

2010-09-17T08:00:00.003-04:00

"Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.  Then Jesus said to his disciples, "I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."   Matthew 19:21-24

   I once read a book to my niece called "Are you my mother?". In this book a baby bird falls out of the nest and goes searching for his mother. The most important thing in this baby bird's life is finding his mother. Along the way he asks everyone and everything he meets if it was his mother.... he is ready to follow each of them until he learns that they are NOT his mother.
   We are much like that baby bird. We are searching for the one who will care for us and nurture us. God is the one. But until we really accept that, we will search for the one thing that will make us feel happy and safe.
   When I was in college I had a friend named John. John is the one who taught me the basics of everything that I believe about God today. One of the things that John drilled into my head is the realization that whatever we make the most important thing in our life becomes "our God". Whatever we value most. Whatever we want most. That becomes our "God".
   If our desire is to attain great wealth, then the wealth becomes like our "God". We do whatever we can to achieve it. We are consumed with it... This thing that we find most important in our lives becomes all consuming.... it can be anything.... Books, Music, Money, Belongings, even people.... if we make something the most important thing in our lives. If we put that before everything else in our lives then it has surely become our "God".
   Wouldn't it be great if we could make God our "God". If our greatest desire was for a better relationship with Him. If we were consumed with the desire to have a better closer walk with Him. If we wanted to be with Him more than anything else... We would be like that baby bird.... always looking for God in everything we do.... the difference would be that God would always be there for us.... He never leaves us. Never deserts us. If we seek Him out, we will find him....
   Dear Lord, I want to see You in all I do. Yet I sometimes forget to look for You. I know that You are always there with me. Yet I sometimes forget to reach out for Your helping hand. I know that You are there for me all the time. You are my safety net. You are there protecting me and keeping me safe. And yet sometimes I fear that which is around me. Please help me to keep You at the center of my life. To turn to You in everything that I do. To seek You out everywhere I go. To remember that I don't need to go around like that baby bird asking "are you my mother?" because I belong to You. And you are always there....

Don't Run With Scissors

2010-09-10T08:00:00.000-04:00

"Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first..."     Revelations 2:4-5

   I can remember when I first learned to hit a softball. I was about seven years old. My uncle was coaching me. We stood in his dining room (yes his dining room) and he was instructing me on how to properly swing the bat. My aunt just watched and shook her head... For what seemed like several weeks he would have me stand in the dining room and practice my stance, practice swinging the bat at an imaginary ball.
   Can you imagine doing that in your mother's house? I sure can't. There were rules against that. If it was fun - there was a rule against it... at least that's how I remember it. My mother did have a rule that there was to be no ball playing in the house. Of course as a child you never understand the reasons for the rules. You think "why can't I run with scissors? I'll be careful. It won't happen to me..."
   It's only now, as an adult, with my own home, that I realize the logic behind the rules. I had the opportunity recently to spend a lot of time with my young niece and nephew. More time than I would normally spend with them, and I found myself turning into my mother.... all of a sudden I found myself enforcing rules. I didn't want to. But I felt it necessary to keep the kids from hurting themselves, each other and me. The kicker was when my seven year old niece decided that she had bowled all she was going to so she threw the bowling ball overhand, across her lane into someone else's lane. Yes, I did say overhand. Well gosh, I kind of lost it there. Especially when the manager of the bowling lane screamed and came rushing over.... But God was working. He calmed me quickly. I didn't yell. God gave me the words, and I said them to my niece. Whispered them in her little ear as I yanked her off the lane. The manager saw this, calmed down and didn't throw us out.... my nephew was embarrassed but glad. Rules are there for a reason.
   God has rules. God wants us to follow those rules. Those rules are there for a reason. They are meant to protect us from hurting ourselves or others, and to protect us from being hurt by others. Like all adults do, God has to enforce those rules. We like children are not so good at following them.
   But if you think I'm saying that works is important, you're not getting it. While I think that God wants us to follow the rules, He has said that it's not about the works. I kind of think that what God really cares about is our attitude toward the rules.
   Jesus did not always follow the "rules". He looked at the situation and did the right thing. What do we do? If I don't follow a rule, simply because I don't want to is that right? If I jaywalk because someone fell and got hurt directly across the street from me and I want to help them, is it wrong? Did I break a "rule"? Sure. Did breaking that "rule" disrespect God or did it honor Him? I think that is an important question.
   God should be our first love. In my humble opinion, I believe that if we love God, we "should" want to do that which honors Him. Doing what God has asked of us is a great way to show that we honor Him, but that is not everything. Our attitude must also be honoring God. If I do good works but do not do them with love then they are worthless works. If I follow God's rules that is good, but it also could be considered worthless if our attitude toward what we are doing is not right. But alas, we are human and as such we are not so good at the rule thing. Much like children we try but we just can't seem to stay focused on what we should. And much like children, we fail to do what God has asked of us. If our attitude is right, if we are seeking to honor God but just can't seem to do it right, it might be a sign that we need to humble ourselves and ask God for some help here.... Paul spoke for me when he said that "he does that which he doesn't want to do and doesn't do that which he wants to do" (paraphrased). Paul loved God. Paul constantly sought to serve God with all of his heart, and yet he too failed at times. But God stuck with Paul and continued to love him, and God will do the same for us when we fail.
   When God is speaking to the town in Revelations He is telling them to get back on track. I think that He is saying "hey, you had it right, but then you took your eyes off Me and turned them back on yourselves. Slow down, come back and lets get back to the basics... or else...." He is warning them of what will happen if they don't get their attitude toward Him back to how it should be.... We love God. We try to do His will. We need to stay focused. With His help we can do it. We CAN honor Him and try to follow His rules. Acts aren't what it's all about but it IS a good way to show Honor toward God IF we can do it with the right "tude".
   Dear Lord, wow, I can't believe that I actually said that rules are there for a reason. You know that I am not very good at following the rules, and at doing what You want me to. You also know that I try. I want to honor You in all that I do. Please know that I want to do what's right. Well usually I do. Know that I am truly repentant for the times when I either don't want to follow the rules, or when I just can't seem to get it right. Please continue to be patient with me and give me those nudges that keep me aimed in the right direction. And thanks for being there with me to guide and teach me as I tried to help protect my special little ones.

The wheels on the bus go round and round...

2010-09-03T08:00:00.002-04:00

"The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ." 1 Corinthians 12:12

I got stuck following a PAT Bus on the way to work this morning. The bus seemed to stop about every fifty feet to let more passengers get onboard. It was a long ride. But you guessed it, it got me thinking.

A bus full of passengers has a personality. As more passengers enter the bus, the personality morphs. It changes as the makeup of the passengers change. If a happy outgoing passenger enters the bus and starts conversing with those around her, the bus will take on a happy cheerful mode. If all the passengers are sitting reading their newspapers it will be quiet and reserved. If a scary looking passenger enters the bus and starts checking out everyone the mood will become nervous and wary. For the folks riding the bus, it might take the same route, but the ride can vary from day to day.... That bus is kind of like life.

Life happens. Every day when we awaken we begin a new ride. We start somewhere. We end up somewhere else. We have several stops along the way. People come and go. Entering our ride for a little while each day. They each bring something different to the table. They each play a different role. Our lives would not be the same without them.

Hopefully God is driving the bus. Each day when we awaken, we ought to be asking Him to take the wheel. To drive the bus. After all, he is the only one who really knows the route. And if problems arise, He knows it's coming and He knows all the detours. Our ride changes daily depending on whom we are in contact with and what is happening in our lives. But the one steady thing is that we have the same driver every day. He will get us where He wants us to go. We just need to be there. And we need to resist the urge to jump into the driver's seat. No matter how long it seems to take to get there. Cause we will only end up lost.

Dear Lord, take the wheel. Please help me to be content to sit in the back seat, and to resist the urge to jump up front. I don't know the way, but You do. I don't know what is coming up in my future, but You do. I can't steer clear of troubles, but You can guide me through them. You know the way. And please help me to just sit back and enjoy the ride. Thanks.

You want me to do WHAT?

2010-08-27T08:00:00.002-04:00

"Better a little with righteousness than much gain with injustice." Proverbs 16:8

   I work in a job that could be looked at as political. I am not a politician, but I work with people who are appointed into their jobs by politicians. This has a direct effect on me. These guys make promises that they can bring XYZ to their local area. Then they come to me to get it done. No problem, that's my job. I get paid to shop. For them. The problem is that there are a lot of strings attached to the money that I get to shop with. You can't just go out and buy anything you want to. Plus I have fourteen bosses. And I am accountable to all of them. So if I am going to buy something for one boss, all of the others have to be ok with it. These guys all mean well. They want to help their local communities. The problem is that they don't understand the rules that dictate what they can and can't buy. So sometimes they make promises that I just can't make happen.
   So there comes the dilemma. Sometimes we try to do the right thing, but we just can't get it done. We want to do it, but our hands are tied. We try to find a way around it. A loophole, or exception, but often it isn't there. And so we have to say "sorry dude, no can do...." When this happens the bosses aren't happy because promises have been made, jobs are on the line.... it's not pretty. But it's got to make you wonder....
   Good people do stupid things sometimes. It's not because they are dumb or anything, but they get tunnel vision. They only see a part of the bigger picture. We need to try to take the blinders off and look at it all.
   If we are serving God and not man; we should not feel too badly about letting the bosses down. But we are human and sometimes having to say "no can do" feels like failure. But then we need to turn to the bible. The living word of God. And see what it says. I know that Jesus went into the Temple and challenged the Pharisees. He felt that one should not blindly follow rules just for the sake of following them.... but He never said not to follow good rules. I think that we need to look at the situation. In the case of my job, there is always some other way that an item can be procured. Some other funding. In this case I think it is honorable and right to stick to our guns and not just do something that we know we aren't supposed to do.
   Do you have situations in your life that challenge and perplex you? Do you wrestle with whether or not you're doing the right thing? Do you wonder when is the time to throw out the rules and when is the time to follow them? Life is full of situations like this.... That is why it is so cool that God is always there for us.... If we turn to Him and seek the truth, we will find it.... If we follow His lead, we will be ok....
   Dear Lord, Please be with me and my friends as we face the challenges that are thrown upon us. Help us to seek Your way in each and every issue that arises. And help us to take comfort in the fact that You are there with us and for us. And let us give the worry to You, and just go along for the ride.....

A brave little girl

2010-08-20T08:00:00.008-04:00

"All your sons will be taught by the LORD, and great will be your children's peace." Isaiah 54:13

   A little girl died today. She was the daughter of a guy I used to work with. She developed cancer about two years ago. She had a leg amputated. She bore great pain. She learned to live with it. She showed great braveness and a love for life. She was an example to all those who knew her. She was a good kid.
   I am sad for my coworker. I am sad for his family. But at the same time, I rejoice for them too. Their daughter is no longer suffering. No longer in pain. And best of all... she is now sitting at the foot of the Father, in perfect health. Her body whole again. No pain. No sickness. No missing leg. She can run. She can play. She can dance.
   God has a plan for our lives. Each of us. He has determined that plan before we were even born. He sends us out into the world knowing what will happen in our lives. From the moment we were born we affected those around us. So even a child has an affect on others. This child's bravery in the face of terrible pain and suffering has touched so many lives. Let us not be sad. Let us celebrate her life. Let us be thankful that God has used her and has now let her come home to be with him. And let us pray that the family can feel some comfort in that. I think it is much harder for those left behind.
   Dear Lord, please be with Jim and his family as they mourn the loss of Kayla and help them to see You working in their lives. Please help them to feel Your comforting touch as they go on. And help them to know, to really really know that she is with You and is ok. Thanks.

Nothing is Impossible

2010-08-13T08:00:00.008-04:00

"With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible"  Matthew 19:26

   As you read this blog, I will be on the road, heading to my first ever family reunion. My dad's family. This will be the first time that some of my cousins have ever met. Those of you who know me know that my family has undergone a huge transformation during the past year. It has been a difficult year for all of us. I have found it particularly challenging. Yet in this very difficult year, I have seen God's handiwork.
   My immediate family does not believe in God. There has been a lot of opposition in the past toward me and my walk with God. I have struggled to try to live my life for God. And to do so in such a manner that they might see God working in my life without pushing them away...
   That meant years of sneaking out to go to Church. Going next door to my neighbors to read the Bible because we didn't have one. It also meant not being my nephew's Godmother because my sister was afraid that if I ever had to raise him, I might send him to church. It meant not talking about God to my family for fear of being physically hurt by my dad.
   But as I said, things change. God has a plan for our lives. He knows what it is. He knows how it will work out. It is His timing, and not ours. We just need to believe that no matter what is happening, it is in His hands. And we need to faithfully wait it out.
   Last spring I moved out of my parents house. My mom wasn't happy about it. My dad was glad. Our relationship got worse before it got better. Something else happened last spring. My dad was diagnosed with a rare lung disease. I studied up on it. My research said that the disease was almost always fatal, but there was no telling how long he would have. He seemed fine for quite a while. Then in the fall our world began to fall apart. I had a personal loss. Someone whom I was very close to. This also affected my dad. He was upset that someone so young and strong could suddenly die. And we had just seen him and he was healthy. About a month later; my uncle (my dad's youngest brother) died from bladder cancer. This also hit my dad really hard. He began to think about his own mortality. He told me that he didn't think he would last out the year. He began to give up. His whole countenance changed. We spent a lot of time together last fall. I would go to his house and he would come out of the bedroom to visit with me. (My mom said that he never came out of the bedroom the rest of the time.) He would bring me newspaper articles to read or would want to discuss current events. We would sit and talk. Or later, when he was weaker and couldn't always come out to the living room we would sit in his bedroom and watch television together. Usually Discover or the History channel. Not much talking going on, but I know he enjoyed those times.
   I never got to share the most important thing in my life with my Dad. I never got the opportunity to discuss God with him. Not directly. Not in detail. We had a few conversations but he never let me get too deep into it. He always shut me off. So I just spent time with him and continued to pray for him. Each time he entered the hospital I would ask if my pastor could come and visit with him, but my dad was clear that he didn't want that.
   When my dad was dying, I was surprised by a phone call from a cousin who said that he wanted to come up to see my dad. What I didn't know was that my cousin had accepted Jesus as his savior several years ago. Like me, he had met with much resistance from family and had not shared much with others. But he felt called to come and share the good news with my dad before he died. It was like an answer to my prayers. God was working. Quietly. In the background. Using his faithful servants.
   My cousin got the opportunity to share with my dad. My dad didn't kick him out. They talked. I don't know the outcome of the conversation. My dad said that he wanted to talk to me alone before he died, but we never got the opportunity. Not that I didn't try. My dad was enjoying having the family around and didn't want to send them out so that we could talk. I think that he thought he would have more time. Shortly before my dad died, his lawyer came to visit. At the end of the visit she asked if she could pray for him. He said ok. She made sure that he knew that she wanted to pray for him "in Jesus' name." He still said ok. This was just hours before he died. God was working that day. I am sure of it, though I will not know the result until the day I join him in Heaven.
   Since my dad has died, I have been blessed with the opportunity to share the gospel with each of my sisters in one on one conversations. And while none of them has accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior, they have not asked me to shut up. God is working.
   So as I head up to this family reunion, I go with the realization that God is working in our lives. That things happen that we think impossible. Nothing is impossible for God. And we can do all things through Him.
   Dear Lord, please use what has happened in my life to give someone else some hope. You have been there for me. Working quietly in the background while life happened. You are working in my friends lives too. Even when they don't realize that You are there. Thanks for always being there. Even when we don't see you. And help us to just have faith to know that You are always there for us.

Everyone Has Compassion

2010-08-06T08:00:00.003-04:00

"Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."   Romans 12:15

   On the way to church the other day God got me to thinking about the word "compassion". I had begun the day with absolutely no idea of what compassion really meant. It was just another word that Christians throw around in conversation, but I had absolutely no clue as to what it really was. You must remember that I was raised in a household which knew no forgiveness. Where wrongs (whether real or imagined) were held against you forevermore.... so I went online and looked the word up. According to my online source compassion is when you put someone else's problems before your own. When you put their needs first.
   I have worked in emergency services for 25 years, working 15 of them as a Medic. I have spent most of my career dealing with people who were not at their best. They are miserable. They hurt. They don't feel well. They are grumpy. Quite often they are not even a little bit nice. But while I am with them I give them my fullest attention. I try to care for them as if they were family. But is that compassion? I am thinking not. Because once I leave them I don't think of them again. I don't wonder if they got better. I don't recognize them if I see them again. I find that I don't even really care how they are doing. I know it seems wrong. But if I let myself care about everyone whom I tended, I would be consumed and could not do a good job with the next patient.
   The ability to turn the caring off is something learned as a young child. I learned to not get to really know anyone. I learned to be nice to people but it was pretty much "out of sight out of mind". I never really had a yearning to know or be known. I was a loner, someone who just didn't need others in my life. It was good preparation for the career to which I would be led, but it was pretty stinky preparation for life.
   It wasn't until I really got God in my heart that I began to actually care about people. It started slowly. I had a very small group of friends whom I cared about. I found that I was interested in how they were doing. I found that I started to think about them even when I was not with them. I would even remember to ask God to help them with things that were not going so well for them. I had never really prayed for anyone before that time. After a while as I began to let God work on some of my problems I found that I began to care about more and more people. I found that I could feel for them. That I really did care what was going on in their lives and not just when I was with them. I began to pray for people who hadn't even asked for prayer.....
   So what was God trying to tell me about compassion that morning? I realized that He was telling me that we all have problems. And that each of us thinks that our problems are the worst problems in the world. But once again He reminded me that we all have the same sorts of problems. Oh, the details might be different, but they are all basically similar. That is what allows us to relate to the problems that others have. We have been through (or are going through) a similar experience.
   Haven't you wondered why it seems like we have some problems that seem to pop up quite often in a small time frame. Are there painful things that you have suffered through this year? Have your friends and family been suffering through similar things too? There is a saying that bad things happen in threes. I don't think it is necessarily limited to threes. But it does seem that bad things happen to us and then they seem to happen all around us. I have found that dealing with some of the bad things that have happened has helped me to feel for others going through those same hard times later.
   I think that you have to have experienced a problem or a hard time to be able to really reach out to someone who is currently going through it.... that is compassion. You have worked through the pain. You have seen how God works and heals it over time. You are willing to reach out and be there for someone who is going through it now, even though it brings back a lot of very painful memories. But you know that God is going to get them through it. And you know He is there with you too.
   It is hard to set your problems aside to be there for someone else. But God has asked us to do that. To put our pain away and to be there for someone else. I'm thinking that is what the sermon on the mount was all about.
   Dear Lord, I know that I can be very self centered at times. Especially when things are not going well for me. I tend to turn inward and away from those I care about. Please help me to take my eyes off myself and to reach out to others. Help me to show compassion and to really care for them. To be a good and loving friend. And help me to be humble enough to reach out to them for help too. To allow them to be there for me. That is a pretty hard one for me to do. I am believing, for in You all things are possible.

The Beauty of a Baby

2010-07-30T08:00:00.011-04:00

"A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world."   John 16:21

   Aren't children just the best? I don't have any so I am looking at it from the outside... But still... I have been around a few.... I am always amazed at how perfect they are.... I was admiring a photo that a friend sent me of her newest grandson and I thought "how wonderful is that?" It really is pretty amazing when you think about it.... As imperfect as we are, when kids are born they are just so perfect.... little hands, little feet, little fingernails... everything is just right.... they are like "little people". But I am reminded that they, like us are born in the image of God. Not to say that God looks like us... but they are awesome to view. Amazingly beautiful. You just stop what you are doing to behold them in all of their glory.... and they don't even do anything..... but yet you are drawn to them....
   I remember when my nephew was born... it was a little over 10 years ago. (He is 10 now in case you missed it!). But when he was about a week old my sister and brother in law brought him to visit Grandma in Pittsburgh... while they were here we took a trip to Kennywood. I remember that day so well because it was the first day that I didn't ride anything. Well no I did ride the train once. I spent the entire day just watching my new nephew sleep. I just couldn't get enough of him.... I think that I probably knew that he would be much more fun when he got a little older and could do the cute stuff, but at that moment I just wanted to sit with him and behold his beauty. I know, I'm a little warped, but I really enjoyed that day... oh and the ride I went on, the train ride... it was his first ever Kennywood ride.
   Many of my friends have children and grandchildren in different stages of growing up, and they are all special. They do have their moments. Challenging moments at times. But they are all a blessing, not only to their parents, but to all of us who have been blessed with the wonderful opportunity to be a part of their lives.
   When I think about how I feel about babies... It reminds me that our love for God should be like that. We should enjoy just sitting there alone with God, to share all of His goodness and pure beauty. That God could love us the way that we love that small child who finds his or her way into our lives, is just so totally amazingly great. We should want to be with God more than we want to do the fun stuff.... Ask yourself if you could sit in a place full of distractions such as Kennywood and yet keep your eyes turned to God. That is the kind of faith and devotion that I long for. To be able to find joy in just being with my God. And to need nothing more than that.... How about you?
   Dear Lord, thanks for bringing such joy into our lives. And for letting those of us who chose careers over family to enjoy the children in our lives too. But help us to love You and to look to You with the same love and devotion that we have for the little ones. And help us to keep in mind that we are all made in Your image. And that You look at us, and love us and protect us the same way we look at the little ones.... for we are Your "little ones".

Time to Share

2010-07-23T08:00:00.009-04:00

"While Paul was waiting for them in Athens, he was greatly distressed to see that the city was full of idols. So he reasoned in the synagogue with the Jews and the God-fearing Greeks, as well as in the marketplace day by day with those who happened to be there. A group of Epicurean and Stoic philosophers began to dispute with him. Some of them asked, "What is this babbler trying to say?" Others remarked, "He seems to be advocating foreign gods." They said this because Paul was preaching the good news about Jesus and the resurrection. Then they took him and brought him to a meeting of the Areopagus, where they said to him, "May we know what this new teaching is that you are presenting? You are bringing some strange ideas to our ears, and we want to know what they mean." Acts 17:16-20

   Paul did not like what he saw around him and was moved by the Spirit to start to share the good news of Jesus Christ with those around him. Paul spoke with Jews and Greeks alike; telling them about Jesus. He didn't pick and choose. He told anyone who would listen. And listen they did. They asked him what he was saying.... As a whole they were interested in what he was telling them.
   Not everyone who listened to what Paul had to say, went on to accept Jesus as Savior, but some did. Paul did not have the ability to sway anyone's hearts. He was the messenger. He put the information out there and God worked in the hearts of those whom He called. After all, God is the only one who can change a man's heart.
   God has asked us all to go out there and share the good news. He wants us to tell others about Jesus. He wants us to share how Jesus has changed our lives. When we talk about what we know we tend to be passionate about it. It is this passion that gets peoples attention and causes them to want to listen. We can't make them believers. We can't convert them. We can only share the word and pray that God will work in their hearts. We (like Paul before us) are the messengers. God is the one who works the magic in peoples hearts. Not all whom we share with will come to accept Jesus as Savior, but some will. The key is that we MUST share the news if God is giving us a heart for that.
   In my church we are having a bible study about end time prophecy. It is quite interesting. It looks like some of the prophecies have already come to pass. It looks like others will soon follow. God has told us that no man will know when that will be... So no matter what is happening in the world, we know that we are heading that way, we don't know when.....
   I have never been that interested in sharing about Jesus before... I always felt that God would just work in someone's heart if He wanted them. I never wanted to appear to be trying to "convert" anyone for fear that I would push them further away from the truth. But I am feeling a sense of urgency. I feel that God is saying it is time to be bold. To go out and share the word with others. Just share. I get the sense that I don't have to be pushy. That even if I just share that "this is what I believe God is doing in my life", and if I share that "this is what I believe even if it is not what you believe, and I just wanted you to know where I am coming from..."
   During the past several months God has given me an opportunity to discuss my beliefs in God and Jesus in a private conversation with each member of my family. Amazingly each of them actually brought up the subject (or said something that made the time seem right for me to bring it up). I prefaced it with a claim that although I would like for them to believe what I believe, I would not push it on them as I would not want to make them run defensively away... the conversations went well. They listened. They agreed with some of the points that I made. They did not instantly accept Jesus as their Savior. But the seed has been planted. I pray that God will use that seed to change their hearts.
   I think that this is what God is calling us to do. Much as Paul did. Plant the seed. Spread the Good News. And then sit back and pray our lil hearts out... and let Him do His thing in their hearts....
   Dear Lord, as You have said; we don't know the time or place for Your return. We know that things are looking like we're getting closer to that time. Many of us feel an urgency to spread the Good News about You to those around us. Please guide us and help us to listen to Your still quiet voice inside us.... Give us the words to say, and the humility to say them in love. And please please please give those to whom we share an open heart so that they will at least listen to what we tell them.... and then help us to walk away knowing that we have done all we can.... and then please do Your thing.... Thanks for letting us help... and thanks for how You work it all out.... Thanks for having our back!

Missing You...

2010-07-16T08:00:00.005-04:00

"For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD,
'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."   Jeremiah 29:11

   I have had a tough year as have many of you. Sometimes I think that my problems are worse than anyone else's but then something happens and I realize that we all have pretty much the same problems. Since last September I have lost several people whom I will dearly miss. Many of you have also lost loved ones. God has been teaching me a lot in the past few months about loss.
   In Jeremiah 1:5 God tells us that He knew us before we were even formed in our mother's wombs. So that means that He knew each and every one of us. He knew we were coming even before our parents did. This means that there were no mistakes. No unwanted children. God planned for us. He gave us to the parents who raised us. He had a plan for each of us. In Jeremiah 29:11 He even tells us that. So that really says it all, or does it?
   I believe that God has been telling me about the ones whom we have lost, that they have done what He sent them here to do. That He had a plan. That He placed us where He wanted us to be. That He had something that He wanted for each of us to accomplish during our lifetime. We don't necessarily know what that something was. It might be what we feel is our "calling" but then again, it may not really be that. Our "calling" might just be what God does to prepare us to do His special task, or it might just place us where He needs/wants for us to be. Sometimes we think we have found our "calling" and then we think "nope, that wasn't it at all, it's this instead..." It may have been one or both or maybe neither. We will probably never be really sure of that until He takes us home. But what I feel He has been showing me is that once we have accomplished that which He wanted us to accomplish, He takes us home to be with him. So that those whom we are missing, are probably sitting with Jesus discussing our progress (or lack of it) in our walk with God. We don't really need to feel sad that they aren't here, because they are in a better place. They are probably really happy where they are....
   Everyone has someone whom they affect. Even young babies can affect us. The birth of a child changes lives forever. The loss of a young child or infant could devastate a parent or it could pull them closer to God. God has a plan for each of us. He puts people in our paths all the time who make differences in our lives. Look around. Who do you know that has had an effect on you? Would you have ever guessed that that person would have made such an impact on your lives?
   I was having dinner with some relatives last night, and we got to talking about my dad. Those of you who know me know that I lost him this past winter. God has really been my strength as I have dealt with his death. I thought I was over it, and yet this conversation last night was difficult. But God helped me through that one too. I realized that each of us is affected by someone differently. My memories are not your memories. Incidents may be the same. But we each take something different away.
   My own walk with God has grown in leaps and bounds in the past few years. I have been surrounded by friends who have walked through hard times with God's help. They have shared their lives with me. I have learned from them. God has taken what I have learned from them and shown me how I too can walk closer with Him. I have had to go through some rather rough storms. Even though I have good friends, I have had to walk through those storms alone with God rather than with my friends. Don't get me wrong, my friends were there for me... praying for me.... just as I do for them when they go through the rough times, but some things have to be handled between us and God.
   To my friends who are going through those rough times right now, know that I and probably everyone whom you are close to are praying for you. We love you and ask for God to strengthen and comfort you in these hard days. There is nothing that we can say or do that will bring you comfort like God can, but know that we have been there and He has helped us through it and He will do the same for you.
   Dear Lord, this was an odd subject to broach, loss is difficult for everyone, and no one is immune to it. We all experience it. Some more than others, but everyone goes through it. Please help us to grow stronger in our walk with you and to let you be there for us in those times of need. And help our friends to realize that they can't make us feel any better during those times, but that their prayers can do wonders. And help us to remember that we are not alone as we go through those times. Please be with my friends. Thanks!

A Straight Path

2010-07-09T08:00:00.002-04:00

"I guide you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths. When you walk, your steps will not be hampered; when you run, you will not stumble. Hold on to instruction, do not let it go; guard it well, for it is your life."   Proverbs 4:11-13

   I was driving to work the other day.   I usually go this one major route that runs along one of our rivers. It's a beautiful peaceful sight to look out through the trees and be able to see the river to my right. Normally the traffic can be horrendous on that road. I just put on some worship music and slowly make my way towards the office. It's my time for me... But that day was different. One of the side roads leading to this main thoroughfare had been closed due to a mudslide.
   What a difference the removal of just one obstruction can make in how fast one can travel down a path. With the road closed, the traffic light was on flash. Because of that we never had the backup that comes from having to stop for the light. What a difference it made. I had been running a bit late that day and had settled in to the belief that it would be a late start for me. But no. With no obstacles in the way I was still able to get to the office on time even though I had a later than usual start.
   Of course you guessed it - this got me thinking... If just one obstacle was removed from the road and it made my travel go smoother and faster than normal... then what about my walk with God? What is my path like there? Do I have obstacles? Duh! vOf course I do! Do those obstacles slow me down in my walk with God? It looks like they must... I probably just don't realize it in my daily life because I am so used to being where I am. Just like I was used to the long commute each day.... I guess that I am realizing that if we can remove even one obstacle along our path that it will make a huge difference in our walk with God.
   The other thing that I am seeing is that just as I can't block off the road (the one with the mudslide) on my own, to improve my daily commute.... I can't remove the obstacles on my own either. But I can be aware of them... and ask God for some help with them. With God's help anything is possible. Those obstacles can be overcome. The road can become smoother, and easier to follow. We will be able to "run" along that path. There will always be a chance that more obstacles will come. But we're not going down that Path alone. God is with us.
   Dear Lord, that was an amazing lesson taught from life. Thanks for not making it a painful one. Please help me and my friends to see the obstacles in our paths and help us to be humble enough to ask for Your help in overcoming them. We realize that there will always be a chance that some new trouble will attempt to block the road, but we know that You are walking with us. Help us to remember that You are always there. And thanks ahead of time for being there...

Being Green

2010-07-02T08:00:00.002-04:00

"In that day, he that shall be on the housetop, and his goods in the house, let him not go down to take them away; and let him that is in the field likewise not return back. Remember Lot's wife. Luke 17: 31-32

     Kermit the Frog once sang a song called; "It's not easy being green." I think that today I am singing a song called; "It's not easy being single." Today's world is a really tough place to try to build a dating relationship.   Especially if you're a Christian. There is a lot of pressure out there to do what feels good and people want you to give in. It's easy to say that it is easier if you're dating a Christian man, but the reality is that you never really know who you're going to fall for.
     Most of my dating was done before I was walking with God. Since the time I really asked God to guide my ways I have been more interested in getting my life back together than in finding Mr. Right.   I kept telling myself that when I date again it will be a Christian guy. A guy who loves God even more than I do.   But life sometimes just happens. In case you haven't guessed, I met a guy. He is very nice. I like him a lot. I would like to start a relationship but it is quickly becoming apparent that he is not a "believer".   And already he is asking me to go beyond my comfort zone. And a lot of really hard decision making has had to happen.   It is easy for a lot of people to do what feels good. And in the past I was no exception. I admit it.   But now I have God leading me in how I should live my life.   And the decisions become a lot harder.
     In Genesis the angels told Lot that he and his family had to leave his town. That they had to go and not look back upon the city because it was evil and God was going to destroy it.   Lot was able to do that but his wife was not. She turned back to look longingly at what she was leaving and it destroyed her. "But Lot's wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt."   Genesis 19:26
      Many a bible study has used Lot's wife as an example of what happens to you if you turn back to your old ways. So this is why dating is so hard for Christians. The pressure is on. It has been a while and it feels good to be wanted but it is just so clearly not what God would have me do. I know that I will probably be throwing away a good opportunity to get back into the dating world, but I realize I will have to take a stand. A stand for God and all that He has taught me. A stand that will probably kill any chances of a good relationship with this nice guy. Or will it? If this is the relationship that God wants for me he might understand. He might even come to know God. I am not gonna count on it, but I AM gonna take that stand. I am gonna believe that God is control and sees the bigger picture here that I do not see. I can't just turn back to my old ways because it "feels good" or because I don't want to be alone... I am not alone.... I am walking with God.
     This was a tough story to write about. It's very personal and private. But at the same time, I am sure that I am not the only one who is dealing with problems like this and I believe that God will use this to help someone else who might be going through similar problems. Or maybe one of you has been where I am now and has some wisdom for me. What I do know is that God sent His Son to die for my sins. Knowing and believing this I have to take a stand. I know it won't be easy, but with God's help and a strong Godly community to support me, I know that it is possible. After all, "I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me." Philippians 4:13
     Dear Lord, I need You now like never before. And I'm pretty sure that it's not just me.   We all do. Thanks for what You have done for me. Thanks for what You have done for all of us. Please give us the strength to do Your will and not what just feels good. Please take away the human pain that I know will come from doing the "right" thing and not the "popular" thing. And please be with this man who doesn't know You. Help him to understand that it isn't that I don't want to be with him, it's just that I want to walk with You more. And maybe You could help him to come to know You more too. I don't really know what to ask for here, but I am sure You already know what is needed. Thanks for always being there...

The "Bathtub"

2010-06-25T08:00:00.000-04:00

"All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name." Acts 10:43

   On a recent night in Pittsburgh, I was at work helping to drain the "bathtub". The "bathtub" is a section of the Parkway East that floods almost every year when the Monongahela River floods as the winter snow begins to melt. It got me wondering. Why do we spend millions to build highways in areas that we know are going to flood. And once we have built them why are we surprised and upset that we must pump them out each time they flood. And why don't we take proactive action to resolve the problem before it happens again. Couldn't we just put in some type of automatic pump that would begin to work as soon as the water begins to rise.
   I wonder if God ever feels like that about us. He created man without sin, but He gave us free will. Adam and Eve exercised their free will, and from that point on we have been sinful by nature. God provided for us a proactive solution when He sent His Son to die for our sins so that our sins would be atoned for and so that we could live in His forgiveness. And yet so many of us don't take advantage of that solution. All we need to do is believe and we can be the children of the King, and our sins will be forgiven. Why don't more people just accept the solution. We will still sin, because we are human, and yet we will have forgiveness.
   I think it all boils down to being able to accept responsibility. The city and state leaders do not want to accept responsibility for taking care of the flooding problem. It would cost them money. How much easier it is to send folks out to deal with it each time it happens so they (the politicians) can get kudo's for clearing the roadway. And as for us. I think that most people just aren't willing to accept responsibility for the sin in their lives. That would require change. Most folks are all about "me". After all this is the "Me Generation". To accept responsibility would require one to make changes and most people do really resist change.
   Someone once told me that it's hard to tell a teenager who is making a hundred dollars a day selling crack on the corner that he would be much better off if he took a job at McDonalds making six dollars an hour. That is where we as a nation are right now. People see only the immediate benefit, but don't look at the bigger picture. God sees it all. He "knows the plans that He has for us". We only see the here and now. It's got to make you wonder....
   Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to remember that we only see the "here and now" and that You do see the bigger picture. Please help us to accept responsibility for the wrongs that we do. And help us to be part of the real solution. Thank You for sending Your Son to be the role model that we can follow. Thanks for always being there...

Praying Out Loud

2010-06-18T08:00:00.001-04:00

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express."
   Romans 8:26

Are you comfortable praying out loud? I am most definitely not! I am always afraid that someone will laugh at me or make fun of me for the way in which I interact with God.
      I once read that when you are praying you should talk to God as if you were having a face to face conversation with Him. The writer said that you don't have to be formal with Him. Just talk to Him as if you were talking to anyone. I thought that sounded like it made a lot of sense and took it up as a practice.
   When I pray, I have a conversation with God. Much like when I write this blog, I try to do it as if I were speaking to you in person. It is not uncommon for me to say to God "hey Man" or "but Dude" after all God is "the Man", He is "the Dude" and that's not meaning any disrespect. It's a two way conversation. I talk and I also listen. I am very comfortable praying silently for people even when I am right there with them, but I wince at the thought of having to pray out loud. On occasion, if moved by the Spirit I will offer up some verbal words, but on my own I would rather not.
   Dear Lord, please give us the ability to listen to You as we pray for others. To follow Your guidance and not our own. Sometimes we let our fears get the best of us. Help us to not let that happen but to trust in You and to follow Your lead. Sometimes the one being prayed for needs to hear the words and sometimes not. You know. You always know. Just help us to do as You wish us to. Thanks.

A Square Peg in a Round Hole

2010-06-11T08:00:00.001-04:00

"Jesus, the Great Shepherd of the sheep….strengthen and equip you with everything good to do His will".   Hebrews 13:20,21

   Have you ever played with one of those children's toys that is a big ball with holes in it. You have to put the pieces into the correct hole? Well I have finally realized that doing God's will in your life is kind of like putting a square piece into a round hole.... it's pretty much impossible to do on your own.... We are just not capable of making it fit. Oh, we might try and force it, but it won't go.... at least without breaking....
   Our lives are kind of like that square piece... We might want to do God's will. But on our own, we can't do it. No matter how much we try to force it; it just isn't going to happen. However, with God, everything is possible. If we give Him the pieces He can make it fit. Every time. Always. No force needed. Of course, the shape will change.... It has to change to fit. But God can change it, and it will end up stronger and better than it was before. (you know that if we tried to change the shape we would surely end up breaking it....)
   God will "strengthen and equip us with everything good to do His will." If we are doing it, it is because of what He has done for us. How He has prepared us. How He has guided and directed us. How He has protected us.
   It's like we are the lump of clay. God is the Potter. If we let Him mold and shape us and don't try to fight it.... we will be the beautiful product that results. Changed from what we were. We will have a purpose. We will be able to be used to do His will. How cool is that.... It's got to make you wonder....
   Dear Lord, mold me. Make me what You will. Help me to want to put Your will before my own. Help me to patiently wait out the molding process and rid me of all that is not good. I want to be the best product You put out there.... Form me, shape me, make me what you will. I want to fit in that round hole and I can't do it on my own. I need You. Thanks for being there and doing what You do.

The Biggest Loser

2010-06-04T08:00:00.001-04:00

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."     Philippians 4:13

   I was watching the television show "The Biggest Loser" the other night and something struck me funny. Well, actually it wasn't funny at all... In my younger days I was skinny. Really skinny. I used to wear "slim" jeans and my mom would still have to take them in... but then the first of many knee injuries happened. And years later, I am no longer skinny. In fact I am the opposite of skinny. I think they call it f.....f.....funny...... (you thought I might say "fat" didn't you? Nah, can't do that...) But anyway on the television show "The Biggest Loser" everyone wants to be the biggest loser. But then the wheels started turning, the smoke started coming out of my ears and my nose and I realized that this was quite odd..... but it made me think.... in a way we are all "the biggest loser". Don't you think? Let me explain...
   As I go through daily living I tend to screw things up a lot. Sometimes it seems like I practically screw up everything I try to do. Many days I am convinced that no one on Earth screws things up more than I do.... It seems glaringly apparent and I am often sure that everyone else knows what a screw up I really am.... but then I realize that is not the truth... that is just one of the many lies that I sometimes listen to in my head. And at that moment I realize that each of us listens to the very same lies. At least I hope I am right cause I would hate to be the only one who feels like this.... But I think that we all screw up the things we try to do. I would venture to say that everyone probably feels like the whole world knows what a screw up they really are.... but in reality we rarely even realize that you have screwed up (unless you find a way to bring attention to it). So I think that in a way each of us is "the biggest loser" at least in our own minds... and it is precisely this that helps to humble us, and to make us open to allowing God to mold us into something better. Think about it. If we could do it on our own, would we even ask God to take the helm? We turn to God because we know we can't do it on our own. The bible says "if you want to be first, be last. If you want to be the best, be the lowest. That is where we need to be to get us to go to God willing to be molded. Willing to be changed. We go to God as the "biggest loser" and He makes us into what He will have us be.... and then; we win..... it's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, I know that You are as aware as I am of all of my faults... hey, You probably even know some that I have not yet acknowledged. But You also are working on me all of the time. You are working to mold me into more of what you want me to be, a reflection of Your love. I thank You for this as I can see the difference already and yet I know that there is still much to do as I am still a long way from perfect. I look forward to the day when Your work in me is completed. I also know that You are working the same miracles in my friends lives. Thank You for the reminders that we are not as hosed up as we sometimes feel. Please help us to keep focused on You and not to focus on ourselves. And remind us to NOT listen to the lies. To recognize them when they try to sneak in there.... and please help me to remember that I can do all things through you..... Thanks much....

Pushing Your Buttons

2010-05-28T08:00:00.004-04:00

"Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross!"
   Philippians 2:5-9

Is there someone in your life who just knows how to get "under your skin"? I have someone like that in my life. My mom had six kids. Child number 2 is a master at pushing buttons. I don't know why I let her get to me, but I do. Usually she says just the right thing (perfectly calculated to boil my blood) and there she blows.... Steam pours from every orifice of my face. My brain turns to mush. My heart races... and my mouth spews forth things which really should not be spewed... it happens every time. The bible talks about doing what we don't want to do... prime example. Given the choice, I would prefer to keep calm and say nothing. Show no sign of irritation and let her wonder why it didn't work.... but alas I am human, and I have not the power to do that on my own...
   On my own. That seems to be the key. I have no power to do it on my own. In fact I dont even like the person whom I become when I get like that. The bible says that we can do all things through Him who saves us.... The scripture above tells us that we should have an attitude like Jesus did. That we should be humble. Even when we don't want to be. Even when it hurts. I know that I have become much better at leaving my problems at God's feet. But this morning I realize that I have been picking and choosing what I leave there. So tonight, in the quiet of my apartment. I will lie prone in front of God and ask forgiveness. Ask for guidance. And sit and listen....
   Dear Lord, please help me to leave it all at your feet. Help me to not hold on to problems and people who are problems. Please help me to remain calm in the face of someone trying to "push my buttons" by reminding me that You have it handled and I don't need to worry. Once again, I ask that You help me to keep my eyes on You and to take them off of everything else. Please help me to better follow in your footsteps and to keep my mind as Yours was. And please take away the pride that keeps me wanting to defend myself against my sibling. Because in the end it just doesn't matter. Thanks for being there.

Was God Tired Or What?

2010-05-21T08:00:00.000-04:00

"By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work." Genesis 2:2

   Did you ever wonder why God took a break after creating the Heavens and the Earth? I did. Gotta tell you, it really made me wonder.... God is more powerful than we could even imagine, right? And creating the Heavens and the Earth would probably have been no big deal to Him right? So then why did it take seven days to do it? and why did He need a rest afterwards? Did it tire Him out? Did He really need a break? I've got to tell you I really pondered those issues and here is what I think...
   God was pretty straightforward with Adam and Eve in the garden. He told them if you do this then that will surely happen. They didn't get it.... God gave very specific and I'm thinking easy to follow directions to Adam and Eve.... but they messed up big time.... And the bible is chock full of stories of other people who couldn't follow simple directions... We could look at our own lives and say the very same thing.... I know I sure screw up a lot. I'm pretty sure you do too.... Don't worry I'm not gonna tell anyone, I'm only saying...
   Anyway we were so messed up that God had to send His own Son down here to show us how to live. Jesus was a living example to us.... Kind of like the little guy who used to pop up on your computer screen when it thought you were confused. The paperclip guy who asked if you needed some help....
   I'm figuring that God didn't really need to take seven days to create Heaven and Earth. I'm thinking that He used seven days to do it; to teach us to pace ourselves. It was like the original example of time management. And resting on the seventh day... well same thing. I think God was setting an example for us. Like a guide. To show us just how important it is to stop and take a break.
   We like to think of Sundays as the day to go to God's house for a visit. Well sure, that is what it is... We take a break from our normal day to day activities and devote a big part of our day to God. I know that many of us devote at least a part of our daily activity to God. And if we were really good, and we could do what the bible says "pray constantly and in everything give thanks" we would be devoting more than just a small part of our day to God. But we are in fact, human. And we do tend to get caught up in whatever we are working on at the moment. So we need to have a set day and time when we can be sure to put God first.
   So if we take another look at the beginning of Genesis. God creates everything. He takes His time. He slowly pieces it together. He sits back and looks at it. He likes what He is seeing.... ( of course He likes it... after all He created it). And then when it's all done, He sits back, takes a load off, and just kind of sits back and watches it.... enjoying what He sees... until....... Adam and Eve got a little bit too cozy with that evil old snake and made the big blooper. Remember when they began to feel guilty and tried to hide from God. I know He asked where they were, but He KNEW. He knows everything. He knows it even before we know it.
   So think about this.... God knows everything about everybody in the world. Billions of people. And He is with each of us all the time. And he is actively working in our lives... all of our lives. Everyone's lives. If He is able to do this every single day, do you think He tires easily? No way! I think that should be proof enough that if this doesn't tire Him out, then a lil old job like creating the world probably didn't tire Him out either... but it's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, thanks for being there for my friends and me. Thanks for not taking a break from our lives even when we don't see, feel or hear You. And thanks for always being the example in everything that You do. And thanks for being patient when we just don't do it as good as You do. Please help us to remember to give You all of our day and not just a little bit... And on a personal note, thanks for letting me be off work on Sundays so I CAN go to church.

A Higher Standard?

2010-05-14T08:00:00.000-04:00

   "For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:2-5

   Do you ever find that you are much harder on yourself than you are on others? I would have to say that I am often very hard on myself. It's like I hold myself to a higher standard than that which I hold others too. You know what I mean, don't you? I will give you a hypothetical example...
   It's like when your friend is trying to do something for you and they screw it up really really badly and you tell them "that's ok, at least you tried..." or you say "it's not really that bad..." but if it was you who had screwed it up you can be sure that you wouldn't tell yourself "that's ok, it's not so bad..." you would be saying "what's wrong with me?" or "How could I screw it up that bad?"
   I know that whatever I am doing; I want to do it perfectly (or "near" perfectly). Nothing less will do... or it feels like failure. But you know what happens don't you? Most of the time I end up doing it far from perfect.... and believe me, I'm not happy with the job that I did. But if you were doing it for me, I wouldn't expect you to do it perfect. I would just be happy for the help and not worry that it might be anything less than I would have done.
   This just doesn't seem right. It feels like a double standard. It looks like I am holding myself to a higher standard than I am holding you too (which I hope I am not), and it could be argued that I felt you were incapable of doing it as good as I can (which I hope I don't).... but in reality I can't do it any better than you can... But then would it be better to hold you to the higher standard that even I can't maintain; or do I hold myself to the lower standard that I was holding you to. But then would I feel as if I wasn't doing enough?
   Or do we compromise... lower my standard for me a bit, and raise my standard for you a bit so that both are about the same...
   So this little hypothetical situation should clearly show us why it is best for us to just not judge the job that others do. But it should also show us that we should not be so hard on ourselves either. Let's leave the judging to God. He knows we're not perfect. He loves us anyway.... it's got to make you wonder....
   Dear Lord, please help my friends and I not to judge each other. To accept all that we are, and all that we are capable of. Help us to remember that even if we can't do it perfect, at least we tried.... and help us to always do the very best we can and to not be discouraged if we can't do as well as we would have liked. And help us to accept help from our friends with grace and humility and without judgement. And help us to hold each other accountable to the same set of standards. Each according to his ability. None is greater than the other. Each has a purpose....

Quite An Education

2010-05-07T08:01:00.001-04:00

   "Train up a child in The Way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from It." Proverbs 22:6

   Thirty Three years ago I entered College. Today I will finally graduate. At the time when I originally dropped out of school about thirty years ago, I thought I would never go back. God has taken me on a very wild life's journey and brought me back to the place where He wanted me to be. I tried to do it my way, but He was there opening and closing doors; and making unheard of opportunities available to me.
   About 3 years ago I felt that God was telling me it was time to go back to school and finish that degree I had begun in 1977. I started to take a class here and there at the local community college but funds were a problem. My work schedule was also a problem. I was working as a Paramedic and did shifts. No steady days off, and no steady shift. Everything varied. I couldn't even count on getting off of a day shift in time to make an evening class because of late calls and paperwork. So I finally stopped trying to take a class here and there. And then an odd thing happened. I got a desk job. Steady days. Steady daylight hours. And I know that God put me in the job. I had been feeling that God had a new job for me and had been fasting and praying and waiting for an answer. I felt that God was telling me that I would have a job by Easter of that year. I got a job offer. I thought that was the one. I verified that they really wanted me. And then the day after I turned in my notice at my job, the new job offer was pulled. They decided they would rather have someone else. Was I worried. No. I was sure that God had it covered. I now had 2 weeks to go at my current job and then would be jobless if He didn't come through. I continued to fast and pray. The very last week before Easter I was offered the job in which I currently work. God had come through. And it was as He said it would be. Anyway about this very same time, God had provided a means of financing school. So I went. One Class a week for a year and a half, and then some online courses to finish up. Finally I am here. Finishing my degree, and in a Christian School. Learning how to keep Christ in the workplace. Learning the ways of the Lord. As Phillipians 4;13 says, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
   I guess there is not much point to this story, except that I hope that it would be an encouragement to anyone whom is not so sure that God really gets involved in our day to day lives. He does. He cares. He wants what He wants for us. He opens doors to open up opportunities to us that He wants for us to pursue. He closes doors to help keep us on path. We just need to ask Him to guide us and then be willing to follow His guidance. It's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, thanks for taking care of me as I went on this journey with You. Thanks for always being there with me in the classroom and in life. Thanks for making things possible that I never dreamed could happen. And thank You that someone might see what You have done, and reach for their dreams. If it's what You want I know You will be there for them too.

Danger! Danger Will Robinson!

2010-04-30T08:00:00.001-04:00

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do."   Romans 7:15

   We all do things that we rather wish we hadn't. I don't think we really want to do bad things. We kind of just do them. Usually we had good intentions but then things just went wrong. If we could always do what was right, we would not need the guidance and direction provided by the Holy Spirit.
   I think that my personal image of the Holy Spirit is kind of like the robot from the old television series "Lost in Space." I didn't see the movie so if there was a robot in it, I'm not talking about that one. Remember the famous line that the robot used to say at some point during each and every episode.... "Danger! Danger Will Robinson!" The robot was like the voice that informed Will that danger / trouble was nearby and allowed him the opportunity to avoid the said danger /trouble. Funny thing is.... it was Dr. Smith's robot. I don't ever remember the robot saying "Danger! Danger! Dr. Smith" the robot only ever warned Will about the danger.
   Now I am not trying to say that the Holy Spirit only warns one of us... that would not be true at all. But if we are willing to listen to that still small voice inside of us, the Holy Spirit uses it to warn us of the dangers / troubles around us. We all get ourselves into binds. It's human nature. We can't avoid it. We try. But we often do (as Paul said) "that which we hate to do". We need that reigning in, that awareness that the Holy Spirit gives us when we have done something wrong.
   Thinking about the television series "Lost in Space" vs the movie. I really liked the show. I skipped the movie. I have found that the remakes are often not nearly as good as the original. Don't you think that is true in life. We are made in God's image. God is perfect, He is great, unimaginably awesome, and yet here we are.... we are surely not perfect. We are nowhere near as good as God is.... kind of like we are the remake... I'm only saying...
It's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, thanks for providing direction, guidance, and conscience. Thanks for filling us with Your Spirit and being there to let us know that we screwed up, and for not just dumping us when we do. Thanks for the little warning signs that you give us daily as we break from that which we should be doing. And please help us to stay on course, to keep on the path... to do Your will and not our own....Thanks.

Are You Doubting Thomas Thomas?

2010-04-23T08:00:00.001-04:00

"He replied, "If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you."    Luke 17:6

   I was thinking about the guy referred to as "Doubting Thomas". The bible says that when the Disciples told Thomas of their visit by the resurrected Christ, he did not believe it possible. The bible says that Thomas insisted that he would not believe it to be true until he had seen Christ's wounds himself. Soon Jesus visited Thomas and showed his scars. Thomas saw them and then believed.
   Jesus had scars. Those scars are what made the difference to Thomas. Being given new life did not remove Jesus' scars. The scars remained so that the one who needed to actually "see" them could see them and believe. Jesus said that it would be much better to have believed without having to see, but He still shows Thomas the scars so that he would believe.
   We are not so very different. Each of us bear scars. All very different, but yet all somewhat the same. I have mentioned the song many times that goes "There's no such thing as perfect people, there's no such thing as a perfect life..." We all have scars. Things from our past that God has healed but that we will always carry with us. God uses the pains from our past to make a difference in the lives of those whom we know. It might be family or friends who see the difference that God makes in your life... or it may be like what happened in my life.
   At one point I was struggling with "faith". All I could see were my failures, and I didn't really believe that God was powerful enough to fix it. Or that He would even want to "fix" someone as hosed as I was. A friend called one day and said "Hey I want to talk you". I went to see them. This friend and I sat outside for hours one evening. She talked. I listened. She told me how God had worked in her life. She told me of the problems that she had faced. They were pretty bad problems. She told me how she clung to her belief that God could repair the problems. That God could put her life back in order. And She told me that it took a while. She told me how God worked a little bit at a time to rebuild relationships and to rebuild lives. I had always seen how things were now. I had never ever thought that it hadn't always been like that.... She showed me her scars. I was like doubting Thomas. I had to see the scars to believe. But having seen the scars I knew that God was indeed more powerful than I had imagined. And much more capable than I had given Him credit for. And I turned to Him and asked for help, this time believing that it was possible. This time with a "mustard seed of faith". I think you know where it went from there...
   We all have scars. We will always have scars. We might not like them, but we need to be open to sharing our scars with others. Not all the time. But as God leads us to... to help others to know that God CAN heal our wounds. To help a "Doubting Thomas" to believe. it's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, Thanks for how You have control. Thanks for how You heal our wounds. Thanks for allowing us to belong to You. Thanks for taking the time to allow us to grow in our faith. Thanks for providing living examples of Your healing grace. Thank you for my friend who's faith is strong. And for guiding her to the knowledge that sharing her scars with me would help to build my faith. And most of all, thanks for continuing to love us even though we sometimes have episodes where we lose sight of how totally awesome and powerful You really are. Please help us to listen to You and to do Your will.

Are You Wealthy?

2010-04-16T08:00:00.004-04:00

"Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life." 1 Timothy 6:17-19

   Are you wealthy?  This years tax season is coming to an end. As usual I waited until the very last moment possible to file, because I never seem to have much money come tax time and I am always afraid I will owe. So yes, I was contemplating the depth of my funds. But then God just spoke to me... He told me that I don't need to worry about the depth of my funds because I just needed to trust that He will provide. He also showed me that I actually have more than enough of what I need. And He showed me what "wealth" really is... and guess what... I am wealthy.
   Wealth is not necessarily related to money or possessions. Wealth is however, directly related to what we have, more specifically to what we have been given. Wealth is a gift from God. Wealth is whatever God has blessed you with that you can use to help others. It can be a skill, a talent, or a trade. It can be compassion, or understanding, or an ability to teach. It can be the ability to care about others. Wealth is what God gave you that allows you to hold someones hand as they go through a hard time, or to let you know to send out a card to someone to let them know that you were thinking about them. Wealth is also the talent to be able to cook a good meal for someone who needs it, or the skill to repair a roof, or fix a car. Wealth is when God allows you the time and the opportunity to be there for others when they need your help. Of course it is also when you have some belongings or possessions that you find can better serve someone else.
   We always knew that money couldn't buy happiness. Even classic stories like the Christmas Classic "A Christmas Carol" really spell that out pretty clearly. That story was about a rich old man who was living a miserable life, it goes on to show how he finds that his poorly treated employee is enjoying real joy. The employee, who really has a hard time making ends meet, is living much happier life than the employer is. That happiness can't be bought.
   If as the saying goes "Jesus is all I need", and "The joy of the Lord is mine" then wow! I have that! Too cool. I also have many things that the Lord has blessed me with. Talents and skills that I am able to use to help others. I couldn't do it without God's blessing. And I am so very thankful for the talents that my friends use to bless me. See it's a community of people whom have each been given different gifts. And all of these gifts come together to help all us to have all that we need. How could we ask for more? It's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, thanks for all You have done for me, for all you have given me. And thanks for allowing me to use what You have given me for others. And thanks for how You allow others to do do the same. Please help us all to be more thankful for all You do. And please continue to show us how we can better serve You by serving Yours.

Heaven and Earth

2010-04-09T08:00:00.001-04:00

"Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven:..." Matt. 5:12

   Did you ever feel like your life is just a parade of problems that seem to come one after another with no end in sight. It can seem overwhelming at times. Kind of like the old saying "hit them while they're down". But didn't you notice that somewhere in amongst all of that badness, if you can keep your focus on God, He will show you something that makes it all a little easier to bear.
   I know that I often have difficulty with the concept of rejoicing and being exceedingly glad. I try to be, but I am just not too good at it. I often get overwhelmed by what is going on around me, and it takes a concerted effort to calm down and move my eyes back to where they should have been in the first place. On God. When I can do that, when I can give the worries of the world to Him who can actually handle them, only then I can then feel any relief.
   In the bible it says that life will be hard. It also says that if we give our problems to God, we won't need to worry about them. He will handle them. He will provide. I think we would all like to be in a place where everything was happy and nice and good. And we will be there someday. That is what makes heaven so cool. Heaven is the place where all will be right. We will be with God. No worries. No problems. No sadness. No pain.
   I learned at a young age that everything has a price. You must pay your dues no matter what you are involved in. When you start a new job, you start at the bottom and work your way up. When you go to school you start in Kindergarden and work your way up. If you join a fraternity in college you start as a probee and work your way up. Heaven is a little different in that we can't work our way in... but we have to endure the problems of the world before we can enter Heaven. If we had no problems in our lives, what would make Heaven seem so enticing....
   Jesus came to Earth and lived as a man. He endured the same types of problems that you and I face. Different people, different times... but still pretty much the same. But.... eventually he actually had to suffer more than you and I do.... and He did it without complaint. He kept His eyes on His Father. He turned to God and said "Your will not mine." Jesus did the grunt work... He served others... no matter who they were... He did not grumble and complain, He sucked it up and did what he had to do.... And it was good.
   Dear Lord, please help me to keep my eyes focused on You. Please let there be a constant reminder of all that You have done for me. Don't let that leave the forefront of my mind. And help me to not complain about the little things. Let me remember how Jesus lived and died. And let me be glad for the opportunity to walk in his shadow. To do Your will, and not my own. And help me to keep in mind that our reward is not here on earth but in Heaven with You. And let me rejoice. Thanks much.

Is Blood Really Thicker Than Water?

2010-04-02T08:00:00.007-04:00

     "But now, this is what the LORD says - he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:1-2

        How many of you have heard the saying "when all is said and done you'll always have your family?" What do you think of that? Is it true.... Is blood really thicker than water? I am not so sure.... I grew up thinking that my family was the only disfunctional family in the world and that everyone elses family was like Ozzy and Harriet's family.   Yeah right!!!   Now I know better.   I think that just about alll families are disfunctional. Probably even yours...  I'm thinking that the saying might actually be correct, but not in the sense that you might think...
        My blood family is not gonna be there for me. I know that. They have as much as said it, and they have demonstrated it many times throughout the years. But the way I see it now. That's ok.   I have another family that I know I can count on. My God family.   God is the father.   He created us. He summoned us. He called us by name. He knows every intimate detail of each of our lives. He knows that are far from perfect. The bible tells us that God will always be with us. That He will never abandon us.
           I heard Charles Stanley on television the other night. One of those God things where you walk into the house turn on the TV and God has set the channel to something you need to see ( you know it was Him, because you weren't even watching that channel when you were home earlier...). Anyway I walked in turned on the television and there was Charles Stanley talking to me about a subject that I have written about in this blog several times over the past few weeks.   He was talking about friends.   Charles was saying that while we know lots of people, folks from our neighborhood, our jobs, our church, we only call a few of them "friend".   And of those whom we call "friend" there are even fewer with whom we share intimate details of our lives. The closest of the close... the true friends.   They are like family. These are the folks who will stand with us through thick and thin. Who will be there when others will abandon us.   Or will they...
           My Pastor spoke at church today about how the Disciples abandoned Jesus when the times got really hard.   Afraid for their own safety they denied knowing Christ.   They were Jesus' closest friends. He said it would happen, they didn't believe it, but then in hindsight they saw that He had called it correctly.   During those trying times Jesus had one true friend who did not forsake Him. That was His Father in Heaven.   God.   God was all He had. God was all He needed.   If this is true for Jesus, could we expect more?
           Getting back to Charles Stanley. He said something that many of you have heard or even said many times.   Our friends, even the closest of friends are going to hurt us sometime. They won't be there when we feel like we need for them to be there.   They might even outright abandon us.   We can't allow ourselves to be angry with them. This is when God's forgiveness comes in.   Jesus did not get angry because the disciples abandoned Him in His darkest hours.   He came back to them 3 days later and showed them love and forgiveness.   Our friends might leave us.   But if we have real relationships, they will come back, hey they might not have even realized we felt like we needed them.   We should welcome them with open arms.   As if nothing had happened at all.   Because we too will hurt them someday. It's going to happen. That's a given. What we need to keep in mind is that we have God. He is there with us all of the time. He never leaves us, even when we don't realize He is still there. Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ. It's got to make you wonder....
     Dear Lord, Please help my friends and I to strengthen our relationships with You. That we might really know you're there when we need you. Help us to turn to You first, and to let You minister to our needs. We know that You might choose to use those around us to do Your bidding, but then again You might just want to handle it Yourself. Help us to not hold it against our friends when it looks like they aren't there for us when we feel that they should be. And help us to not kick ourselves when we are not able to be there for our friends and help us to remember that You are there for our friends too. And help us to remember that You might just have wanted to take care of the problem Yourself...

Blessed To Serve

2010-03-26T08:00:00.000-04:00

"A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9

   God calls each of us to serve. He has a special plan for each of us. There are ways for each of us to serve Him that no one else can... It has been in the works since long before we were even born. He sometimes gives us special skills or talents that can be used to build up the body or the community in which we live and work. He calls us to serve in different ways. Some serve in the Church, some in the community, some in both... but everyone has their very own special something that is needed. Many of us have jobs. Many of us have gravitated into the job or career in which we work because we felt that God was calling us to it.... Sometime we love our jobs. Sometimes our jobs can be a real pain in the keister. It's not always "fun" to serve. But then again at least some of us are blessed enough to have jobs, even if we aren't always happy in them. I have some friends who would love to be working right now, but for a variety of reasons can't. We all long to do what God has planned for us. Sometimes we are called to serve in a place other than the workplace. Maybe our family needs us. Maybe a volunteer organization needs that special something that only you can give. We think we have to work.... sometimes we think we have to work all the time... But as we discussed a few weeks ago, there is a season for everything. There are times when I just dread going into work, but sometimes I enjoy it so much that I forget I am even working. I was just talking with a friend this afternoon. He reminded me that sometimes we are just blessed ourselves to be able to work in fields that we love. To be able to earn our livings doing things that we would gladly do for free. What a cool thing is that!
   But I am also reminded that my friends who are not working, are serving God, by being there for their families and friends too. I have some friends whom I am so thankful for who have been able to be there only because God allowed them the free time to be there when they were so badly needed. What a blessing. We sometimes get so bogged down in thinking about the what if's that we don't see the blessing in stuff like that.
   I know that sometimes I get discouraged by days full of meetings where everyone wants what you can't give them. Or when I want to do something and go somewhere and I can't cause I have to work. And yet on other days I am encouraged by some small thing that happens that makes me want to do the "happy dance" around the office. What I try to remember is this.... I am there to serve God. Not to please man. I work at the pleasure of my Lord. I serve at the pleasure of my Lord. Wherever. Whenever. Whether I feel like it or not. That is what I was made to do. God knows the plans He has for us.... what a wonderful thing... It's got to make you wonder.
   Dear Lord, Thanks for the opportunity to do your will. Thanks for giving me the tools and the talents that I need to do it. I am so glad to be able to serve. I am thankful for others who serve You too. Help me to remember that no matter where I am, no matter what I am doing, it should be for Your glorification or for the edification of others. And thanks for not punishing me as I deserve when I grumble about it.... Thanks for the little things that You do just when I really need a "pick me up" to remind me that You are there with me.

Words. Words. Everywhere...

2010-03-19T08:00:00.008-04:00

^"For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." Hebrews 4:12

   Dale Carnegie once said "Seek first to understand then to be understood". Words. They are everywhere. And many words have several meanings. The English language is especially difficult to master. The bible has been translated into so many different languages that even scholars fight over what certain passages of scripture really mean...
   We need to choose our words very carefully. Words can be used to build up, or edify but they can just as easily be used to attack or tear down. Sometimes the same sentence or group of words can have several different meanings, depending on the situation. If I told you to "go pack sand" would it necessarily be a bad thing? Maybe.... but what if we were trying to stop a river from flooding and we had sand that we needed to pack into sandbags. Then telling you to "go pack sand" would be akin to giving you direction or guidance.
   We own the impressions that we leave with others. If I say something to you. And you are offended by it. Then I am responsible for that. I must pick my words carefully, and not speak before thinking. And it is not limited to just words. Looks, and actions work the same way. And it's not just when we are with others.
   Have you ever been in your car, driving down the road when someone in the car ahead of you does something that you consider to be like the dumbest move a driver could do... is he driving like 10 miles an hour in a 25 mile an hour speed zone? Is he waiting until the opposite traffic is in the next county before making a left turn? Is he talking on a cell phone to make it worse? Doesn't that just boil your blood? Doesn't it make you want to shake your fist at him, and shout some unmentionables at him? But then doesn't that small voice inside your head say "hey, what are you doing?" And isn't it then that you realize that even if no one is around to get offended by what you are thinking, saying and doing... God still hears it, sees it and knows it? And doesn't that make you feel like a real buffoon? Yep. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt to prove it! (only kidding about the T-shirt - but if there was one you can bet I would have it) It's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to pick our words carefully. To guard our minds, so that You may be foremost in our thoughts and on our tongues. And please help us to be more patient where we would naturally tend toward impatience. And let us use our words wisely so that we might shine your light rather than our own. And thanks ahead of time...

Out With The Old!

2010-03-12T08:00:00.015-05:00


   "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ,  he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new." 2 Corinthians 5:17

      There is a song that says "I'm not who I was".   Wow, is that true.   The bible tells us that if we are in        Christ then we are new creations.  So literally we are not who we were...  But I have got to admit that there are      many times when I feel like the "same old me".  When I ask myself "where is that new creation?".     But then after I freak out a bit, I sit back and think about all that God has done in my life.  And it is only then that it sinks in... my   body may be the same, but I AM changed.  No question     there.  I do not think as I once did.   I guess it's like in 1     Corinthians where it says  "When I was a child I spoke as a child I understood as a child I thought as a child; but when I became a man I put away childish things."  When I look at my life I normally don't see the growth.   It is only when I take a step back and look at what God has done, that I see the change.

       I was talking with a friend yesterday.  We were talking about growing in our faith.  One of the things that I found significant was that we agreed that when we look at ourselves we don't see ourselves in the same light that others see us in.   I feel pretty confident in saying that we probably don't see ourselves as God sees us either.  I know that when I look in the mirror  I have a tendency to see the bad things in myself.  I would guess that most of you probably do too.

        I have a few really good friends that I can turn to for guidance or advice when I need it.  Whom I count on to correct me when I go off track...  this doesn't take the place of going to God or listening to the small voice that the Holy Spirit puts inside me.  But I only mention this because at one time, in my mind I thought of those friends as "all together", as much more mature than I am and I looked up to them much more so than I do today.   Not that they aren't "together".   They are.   And I do respect and love and look up to them... but not like before.   I realize now that they are just as screwed up as I am.  It's like another song says: "There's no such thing as perfect people, there's no such thing as a perfect life."  And I know now that God uses us to help each other.   It's a two way street.  They are able to help and support me.  But ALSO, I am able to help and support them.  And my help and support is as important to them as theirs is to me...  None of us is perfect... that's why we need God.  He takes the director's chair and guides us, directs us and challenges us to live right.  That means doing His will.  We, being human, tend to screw it up pretty royally sometimes.  But God has put friends into our lives to help keep us on track... He has surrounded us with His army.... Some of them are slave drivers, others are gentle nudgers.... but they all help us to keep our eyes where they belong.

     So I am not who I was, and neither are you... Ain't it cool?  Oh yeah.   God put the people around you in your lives to be there for you.... an earthly reminder that He works through us and in us.  He knows what He's doing... even though we don't.  It's got to make you wonder...

     Dear Lord,  thanks for always being there working where we see you sometimes, but for still having our back even when we don't see you...  and thanks for the things you have done in our lives.   Thanks for dumping our old selves, and replacing them with new selves.  Even though we don't always feel "new".  Thanks for the fellowship that you have provided for us.  And thanks for the friends that you have brought into our lives.  Thanks also that even though we are all majorly flawed we can still be there for each other, supporting, guiding and praying.   Dude, You rock! Thanks.

It's not always what it seems...

2010-03-05T08:02:00.000-05:00

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

     We have had some tremendous amounts of snow this week. More than two feet in most of my local area. As I look out the window I can't help but to think how awesomely beautiful it looks... but then reality sets in...(doesn't it always?) And I realize that I have to shovel it....(I shoveled snow for over 5 hours one day). I am reminded how dangerous it can be to drive in it...  And as soon as I open the door to step outside I am quickly reminded that it's cold out there.... So there you have it. Beauty is not always what it seems.

       People are kind of like snow in that what you see on the surface is not usually everything it seems to be.   But we often make "snap judgements" based on what we "see" on the surface.   Someone who seems to be always joyful and cheerful might really be hurting inside. Someone who seems to be really miserable might actually be quite nice if we get to know them.   Someone whom you think doesn't care for you because they never say good morning might really just be to shy to say hello to someone they don't know well.    And sometimes there is just so much going on in a person's life that they might jump from one emotion to the next without any rational explanation.

       They call it an "oxymoron" when something happens and it should be good but it could also be bad.... when two things that are together don't really belong.   I am currently finding that death is an oxymoron. Someone dies.   We are sad and hurt very badly because we will miss them. But yet, if we believe God's word we realize that we will see them again. We know that they were not happy with the way they were in life, with failing health and an inability to function at the level they would have liked to be functioning at.

      We know that death is the end of pain and suffering. That with God, they are healthy and strong and painfree. But still we cry. We should be happy for them... and in our own way we are.... but still we cry.   We make jokes and laugh to hide the pain... but still we cry.    We have God to take care of our needs, but especially if the one whom has died is a parent, we feel abandoned and left to fend for ourselves.... even though we know better... and still we cry. We feel like our heart is breaking and yet we know we should be glad that they are with God.... and still we cry. We know that if it were us in their situation we would rather be with God... and still we cry. It's got to make you wonder....

       Dear Lord, please help us to see You working in our lives during all of our situations. Please remind us that it is not always what it seems. Please help us to cling to You and to not make "snap judgements" of others.   Beauty on the surface does not always run deep. You know what's in our hearts. Please just wrap Your arms around us and hold us tight so that we really feel Your protection and love in our lives. And thanks so very much for being so patient with us...

Two Types of People

2010-02-26T08:00:00.001-05:00

"I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world." John 6:51

   There are only two types of people in this world... "Believers" and Non-Believers". If one accepts that Jesus Christ is their Savior and Lord then they are a "Believer". If not, then they are a "Non-Believer" and that is just how it is. Believers are often identified as Christians which is correct. However, not everyone who calls themselves a Christian is actually a "Believer".

   Every one of you was raised within a religion. Whether it be Protestant, Catholic, Methodist or some other religion. You worship wherever you worship now, and in many of your cases that would be in our church. You now identify yourself as a Christian or as a Believer rather than as a Catholic or Methodist or whatever religion you were raised in. And that would be correct. A religion is NOT a heritage. The religion of your family should not identify who YOU are. You should be identified / labeled by what YOU believe rather than by what your family may believe. And no one should ever make assumptions because of that.

   Look in the bible. There are only two types of people Believers and Non-Believers, there is NO IN BETWEEN. Either you believed or you didn't ... John 14:6 says "There is only one way to the father, but through Me." Either Jesus is your bread, or he is not...

   If you were raised a Catholic and now you have accepted Jesus as your personal savior then you are called a Believer or a Christian... you are not know as a Catholic who has accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior. For that matter if you were raised in Canada and believed that Jesus was Lord, you would also be called a Believer or a Christian instead of as a Canadian for Jesus. So why would anyone dare to label someone else that way? No wonder people keep secrets... it's got to make you wonder...

   Dear Lord, I love You. I believe that You love me too. I give my life to You to use as You see fit, and not as I might want to... Please help me to be able to forgive those who make assumptions about me and about others that are not based on who we are and what we believe. And please help my friends to understand that my anger is something that I am dealing with and that I understand that I am not big enough to lose the anger on my own, but only with Your devine help.

If you thought you were having a bad day...

2010-02-19T08:00:00.001-05:00

"I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God; I myself will see him with my own eyes—I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me!" Job 19:25-27

   Today marks the one month anniversary of my father's death. I have been pretty well caught up in feeling it. I was numbing myself out for the first two weeks but then it set in and I felt like someone had ripped out my heart. I was pretty surprised by how much it hurt, especially as my dad and I had not been that close. But this morning the voice of God just kind of said to me "If you thought YOU were having a bad day, try looking at Job." I have been caught up in my own grief and haven't wanted to join the rest of the world as life moves on... but I listened to God and took a look at the book of Job. A good look. Job really had it bad... He lost so much more than I did... And boy did he suffer.... God allowed Job to suffer... God did not cause the pain, but He allowed Job to feel it. And He used it to teach Job and his friends a thing or two...

   A key thing to note is that Job felt the pain. He had to work through it. He never blamed God. Was he angry and frustrated about the pain. Yes. Of course he was. But he never felt it was a punishment for any wrongdoing. He trusted that God would get him through it... Remember that doesn't mean he liked it. It means he knew he would get through it with Gods help. He knew that God was the answer.

   I think that the verses I quoted above are really the key to the book of Job. He knew that in the end he would be with God and all would be well. He knew that was the goal. To be with God for eternity. I can't help but think that when Job says that his Redeemer lives and will stand upon the earth in the end - he is talking about Jesus. I think that was pretty amazing all things considered. It's like God gave Job a prophetic vision to see how it will be so that he could use that to keep the faith that his savior would redeem him.

   Job did not have a church, Jesus had not yet even been born. He was surrounded by a people who did not have the same feelings about God that he did. From reading this book it appears that Job had a personal relationship with God and he trusted that God was there for him. Even though it didn't look like it on the surface.

   What can you and I take from this lesson. Well lets see... 1. We are going to feel pain. 2. It is ok to feel the pain. 3. God is with us. 4. God will allow us to suffer. 5. The pain WILL eventually end, even if it doesn't seem like it. 6. Often God will use that pain and suffering to teach us some type of life lesson. 7. We need to keep our eyes on God. It's got to make you wonder...

   Dear Lord, please help us to keep our eyes on you when everything seems to be falling apart around us. Remind us that you are there even though we feel so alone. And please help us to fill the hole in the area where our heart used to be. And please, please, please when the pain seems so unbearable, remind us that it will eventually end. So that we can keep on keeping on... Thanks...

I've Got A Secret, and So Do You

2010-02-12T08:12:00.001-05:00

"...would not God have discovered it, since he knows the secrets of the heart?" Psalm 44:21

   Secrets, everyone has them. We've all got secrets that we keep. Things that have happened in our lives that either scared the bejeevers out of us, upset us greatly or just plain old embarrassed us. We hide them from each other. We try to hide them from ourselves but they are always there, lurking in the background of our lives. We try to hide them from God, but we can't. He knows what is in our hearts. Secrets aren't always bad things. Sometimes we just don't need to share everything with our friends. You know what they say "TMI! TMI!" But sometimes we hide things because we believe that if these things got out it would cause us great pain. The problem is that we hide things because we are afraid that our friends won't look at us the same if we share our secrets. Our friends, our real friends in Christ love us for who we are. If we are afraid to share all of ourselves with them then do we really trust them? Do we actually trust that their love is stronger than just on the surface? Do we trust them enough to let them see all of us? And that brings us to God. If God brought us together to be able to support each other and to love and care for each other, then does it not seem that if we can't trust the ones that God brought to us, are we really trusting God?

   God knows everything that is in our hearts. There are no secrets from Him. He knows our innermost thoughts and fears. He has plans for us as stated in several spots in the Bible. He want's good for us. He want's us to be able to love and trust each other. He brings people to us whom He wants us to bond with. He brought together David and Jonathon, Moses and Aaron. God provides people who can figuratively "hold our arms up" when we are trying with everything we have to hold onto God's coat tails but just need some human support in the process.

   Those of you who know me know that I have recently gone through a great loss. It has hurt much more than I could have ever imagined. I have been hanging onto God's coat tails with everything I have in me. But I also needed my friends. I needed to be able to just sit with them. Talk with them. Cry with them. Quietly play on the computer with them. I needed them to hold up my outstretched arms as I reached for God. But I had secrets. And I could not let them into a part of my life that I was hiding because I was afraid that it would change our relationship. I had seen things in the past (not with these folks) but I had let it scare me enough to not trust completely. I wasn't trusting my friends. I wasn't trusting God totally either. Because if I was trusting God totally, I would have realized that this wasn't a problem. God worked on my heart. He showed me that I had to trust Him enough to go to my friends and share the "big secret". He really had to work hard to convince me because I can be pretty stubborn at times.

   But God's will is much stronger than mine and I finally gave in. I went to my friends on the morning of my great loss, and shared my secret. And it turned out that God was right. Go figure... As my one friend said, I might as well have told them I was Canadian. It was no big deal. What was traumatizing me for years was not even a problem for my friends. They loved me anyway. It didn't change anything. Well it did change something. I was now trusting them the way that God wanted me to. And this allowed me to let them in when I needed them most.

   We all have secrets, things that we won't share with others. But ask yourself this: Do I trust God enough to share myself with those whom he has put in my life to support me? There will always be things we don't share because it would just be "TMI" but there are other things we try to hide that really are barriers to trust. We let them out only when we need to. They make it so that we can't share ourselves or ask for help when we really need it. God knows what's in our hearts. And He still loves us.... so will our REAL friends... it's got to make you wonder...

   Dear Lord, please help us to remember that You know everything. And that You, like a perfect parent (as You are) want the best for us. And help us to remember that You bring people into our lives because you want us to be in relationships. Relationships that edify, build up and support each other. But to do that we must have true trust. Trust in each other, and trust in You. Help us to have that real trust. Help us to not hold back, if we need to share. And help us to really love each other in spite of our very human idiosyncrasies. Thank You for always being there. And thank You for the friends that You have surrounded me with.

Jesus Loves Me

2010-02-05T08:00:00.002-05:00

"Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the Kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it at all." Mark 10:15

   I love to watch my friends child at church. She jumps up and dances without abandon each week as we have a time of worship. She doesn't care who sees her. This is a time between her and God, and it's as if none of us were in the room. That is so cool. Children are not afraid of being embarrassed. I think that we need to be more childlike sometimes.
   On Christmas eve we sang a song that I have not heard since my childhood. It was one of the first songs that I ever remember learning. The song was called "Go Tell It On The Mountain". Such a cool song. And there are others.... There are a few children's songs that I often sing to myself as I drive my car or putter around the house. I don't know all of the words because I was not raised in the church but I sing them anyway... or at least what I can remember of them. One says "Jesus loves me, this I know. Cause the Bible tells me so... la, la, la, la, la, la, la. We are weak but He is strong. Yes Jesus loves me. Yes Jesus loves me. Yes Jesus loves me. The Bible tells me so..." (the la, la's are because I don't know the words that belong there). Awesome song, so simple, so basic, and yet it says so much. There is another song that goes "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine let it shine...."
   I hope that some day my friends who like music can teach me these songs and more...then I can really sing them.... For such simple little songs they bring me much joy.
   We need to be able to receive God's kingdom like children do...
   When my father died; my young niece was quite upset. She missed him. Trying to ease her pain, I explained that he was with God now. And I went on to tell her how when people go to live with God, there is no pain, no suffering, no trouble breathing or walking or running. That no one needs oxygen or canes or wheelchairs. Her eyes brightened. She thought for a moment and then she said. "Well I did ask God if he was ok, and He said he was." Then after a few more moments of conversation about living with God, she said that she wanted to give her grandfather a hug. She just reached out and did a big "air hug". And then she exclaimed, "I think I might have squeezed him too hard." THAT IS FAITH. Childlike faith. We need to be able to keep it simple, and not overanalyze things. Trust it to be true. And allow ourselves to be awed by how great God is. We need to be able to give ourselves freely to God. And our lights will shine... and the world will see... and maybe, just maybe... they might want to get them some of that....kind of like how I feel when I watch my friend's child dance for God. It's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, help us to simplify our lives and to see Your greatness in everything around us. And let us love You without abandon, the way You love us.... Help us to just believe, without question, like young children do. And please help us to shine our lights so that maybe someone might see the light and decide that they want to get them "some of that". Please use us, make us Your tool.

A Time For Everything

2010-01-29T08:02:00.001-05:00

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1-11

   I spent a lot of time this week reflecting on this passage of scripture. I lost three people whom were important influences on my life this past week. the first was my father, the second was my Hazmat Chief, and the third was a fellow firefighter who supported my decision to teach. I have know all three of them as long as I can remember. Two of the three knew they were dying and chose to go on hospice to die at home with their families. The third fell, broke his hip and never returned from the hospital. I will miss all three. The hardest was my dad. Not for the reasons that one would expect, but rather because I never really had a good relationship with him until the last year of his life.
   It was only as my relationship with God grew, that I was able to build a better relationship with my dad. He didn't believe in God. He never read a bible. He and I argued and fought over anything and everything. We never saw eye to eye about anything. But as my relationship with God grew, so did my relationship with my dad. My dad kept saying that I had changed. That he didn't know what it was but that it was a good thing. A year ago I was afraid of the man. A week ago I was afraid for him. God healed the wounds that both of us felt. In his last few months my dad spent most of his time in his bedroom. But often he would venture out into the living room to visit if I came by the house. He would bring articles clipped from newspapers about things going on in the community and the world. He would say "I saw this article and thought you might be interested in it...". As he grew weaker and could no longer make the trip to the living room, I would go to his bedroom, plop down in a chair and we would discuss the days politics or just watch television together.
   On the last day of my dad's life he told me he wanted to talk to me alone. We never got that chance. I can't wait to see what he has to tell me when I join him at God's feet. What? You say how? Well that is where God's timing comes in...
   Jeremiah 1, Isaiah 53, Psalm 139 and many other scriptures tell us that God knew each of us even before He formed us in our mother's womb. Jeremiah 29 tells us that God knows the plans he has for us.... that in itself tells us that God has a plan for each of our lives. Ecclesiastes tells us that there is a time set aside for everything that happens in our lives. If God has a plan, and has a time set aside for everything to happen in our lives then that is a pretty structured plan. Free will can sometimes get in the way, but God has a funny way of guiding things to where He wants them to be.
   My dad was dying after eighty-five years of denying God. I had tried to share the good news with him on many occasions and been shut down. My Pastor always said don't push it, if he shuts you down let it go. Forcing it will only make him angry and he will not hear the word. God knows the time. God will create the right opportunity and will work it out so that he will want to hear it. The night before my dad died, he had a long talk with my cousin who shared the word with him. My dad didn't shut him down. They discussed it for almost an hour. My dad said that he didn't agree with everything my cousin said, but he listened and didn't get angry. The next day, just hours before he died, my dad's attorney asked if she could pray with him. He said ok. She got bold and said that she would like to pray for him in Jesus' name. He said ok. That was BIG for my dad. That would have never happened a year ago.... God's timing. I never heard my dad say he accepted Jesus, but I can't imagine him allowing his attorney to pray for him in Jesus' name unless he had. Maybe that's what he will tell me when I see him again.
   And when we look at how God works... I see that within my own life God has been working and it sure seems like it is part of a plan. A year ago I would not have been able to have handled even my father's death, without the other two coming at the same time. But God has been working. A year ago I would have turned to my friends to be my rock. I would have wanted them to make it bearable. But this year, I have God as my rock, my strength, my go to guy. Sure I called on my friends. I needed them to be there for me...(and they were- I have the world's best friends), but I was hanging onto God's coat-tails with all I had. He got me through this. My friends were there to pray with me, cry with me, and support me just as Aaron helped to support Moses' arms on the mountain top.
   God DOES have a plan for our lives. Within that plan there is a time for all things. and as Philippians 4:13 says "I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me..." It's not always gonna be easy. But with God as our guide, we will surely get through it. It's got to make you wonder...
   Dear Lord, I am thankful that You are the rock that I can turn to in any storm. I am thankful that you have surrounded me with some of the best friends a girl can ask for. May I some day do for others what they have done for me as I have weathered this storm with You. Thank You for Your perfect timing, even if I sometimes don't see it until it's over. And thank You for not giving up on any of us...

A Visit To The Grand Canyon

2010-01-22T08:00:00.001-05:00

"O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens. From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger. When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place..." Psalm 8:1-4

   Have you ever visited the Grand Canyon? I stopped there once, when traveling east from San Diego to Pittsburgh. After having actually been there and seen it I would have to say that the Grand Canyon must be the most beautiful place on Earth. I took many photographs which were beautiful. Really excellent photographs. But the funny thing is that they really didn't do the Grand Canyon any justice. It was just so difficult to capture the true beauty of the place in a photograph. Videos that I have seen of the Grand Canyon are nice, especially the 3-D stuff you see at the museums, but once again they still don't do the real thing any justice.

   I think that God is kind of like the Grand Canyon in that way. God is so awesome, so all powerful that it is impossible to really describe how great He truly is. I would ask you to imagine the most beautiful place that you have ever visited. God actually made that place... He is just so much better than that place is... now think about the person whom you love more than anyone in the world. Oh come on, you know there is someone like that in your life.... now imagine God.... God loves you so very much more than you love that person whom you were just thinking about. Wow. Just wow. Rocks your world a bit, doesn't it?

   I just thought it would be good to start the new year thinking about the greatness of God. It's just so cool that as great as He is; He chose each and every one of us to be a part of His family. Dude, we're on the winning team... How cool is that? It's got to make you wonder...

   Dear Lord, thanks for picking us. Please help us to recognize Your greatness and help us to turn to you in our times of need as your shoulders are much stronger than ours are. And help us to realize that You really are way more able to handle our "situations" than we are... And let us be reminded of Your true awesomeness as we look out into the world. Let us see and recognize the signs of Your greatness all around us... Thanks for always being there...

Pride and Prejudice

2010-01-15T07:00:00.003-05:00

"From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live."   Acts 17:26

     I was thinking about the upcoming National Holiday - Martin Luther King Day.   Dr. King was a man of God. He believed that what the bible said was true. The bible teaches us that God created Adam, the first man, and all men are the offspring of Adam. We all come from the same place.   President Abraham Lincoln probably said it best when in his infamous Gettysburg Address he said "... all men are created equal..."

     I think that if we all look closely at our lives; each and every one of us has been discriminated against at some point in our lives. Whether it was because of our color, our sex, our age, our weight, our eye color or anything at all... each of us has been stereotyped and judged for something that we have absolutely no control over(in most cases).   Many of us try to overcome that unfair bias by coloring our hair or hiding our age,   some people even try to change their sex... so why is it that we look the other way when we see people discriminating against others. Why do we even need to march for rights.... why can't things be as the bible said they should be....

      Jesus showed us some excellent examples of how to deal with people who are different from ourselves. The parable of the Good Samaratin was an excellent example. Samaratins were looked down on at the time of Jesus. And yet it is this person who is treated as much less than a person who took the time to care for the travelor in the story. He cared for the travelor as if he were a member of his own family. So out of character for that area in those times. And what about the Lepers... It was actually illegal to talk to the Lepers, let alone to touch them or be in contact with them. Yet Jesus walked among them and healed them.

     What does the bible show us about slavery.   Slavery is discussed in many places in the blble. God helped Moses to free the captive Jews from slavery. Does this not show that God does not wish for one man to own another? If all men are the descendents of Abraham, then we are all of the same blood line.... different yet the same. Didn't Jesus come to show us the way. Wasn't the greatest commandment the one that says to "love God"? And wasn't it closely followed by lthe commandment to "love your neighbor"? Remember, we are all of one bloodline, and if we go back far enough we are ALL descendents of slaves.

     So Martin Luther King was a man of God, telling people to do what the bible says they should do.... reminding us of what God Himself wanted us to do according to the bible. He walked through the streets urging men to love one another and asking for the violence against some of God's children to be silenced. Do'nt we have an obligation to do the same? Aren't we called to "love our neighbor as ourself" and to help our neighbor when he needs it, not making him wait until tommorrow to do what we can do for him today?

      It is sad that someone felt the need to gun a man down for reminding us of what God clearly tells us is our duty in the bible.    It is even sadder that we must create a National Holiday to remind us of that and yet our voices are quelched by "freedom of speech" folks who dont want us to remind them that Dr. King died because he believed in God's word so strongly that he was willing to speak out. He was just doing what God wants for us to do. But the world; they just want another day off work with pay....it's got to make you wonder....

      Dear Lord, let us remember why Dr. King died. Not just for the blacks in the south, but for all men and women who feel the pain of prejudice and hate whether it be for their age, nationality, sex, education level, eye color, hair color, or skin color. And let it remind us to keep our hearts open so that we may try our best to love our neighbors as we would want to be loved. And please help us to remember that he was just a man doing what you have told all of us to do. Help us to not elevate him to something more than a man doing your will. Please put blinders on us so that we no longer see the differences in people so that we may treat each other as we ourselves want to be treated. And may all men come to know Your word and come to know You and want to do Your will. And please help us to treat each other with respect and love as we deal with each other day to day.

Winning The Cruel Game

2010-01-08T08:00:00.000-05:00

"Jesus turned around and, seeing her, He said, Take courage, daughter! Your faith has made you well. And at once the woman was restored to health." Matthew 9: 22

   Have you ever felt like your world was just falling apart? I guarantee you that I have felt like that, and I have a strong suspicion that you have too. It's easy to get dragged down into the lowest lows when we feel like that. If you're like me, you tend to take your eyes off of God and put them right back on yourself. I don't know what we find so interesting about ourselves that we can't take our eyes off of ourselves, but that is what happens, isn't it? We quit listening to God, and the quiet inner voice of the Holy Spirit, and instead we start to listen to Satan's lies. He's good. Really good. He takes something that we know to be true, he starts out telling us the truth, but then very very subtly he changes it a little and if we don't catch it quickly enough he changes it a little more until suddenly we are listening to outright lies. We may realize it, but by that time we are so sucked in that we can't stop listening and we find ourselves tricked into thinking it "must be true". His hope is that we will just accept that and then it will become our reality.

   If we look at our lives when we are not at "rock bottom" we can usually see at least one way (and often more) that God has worked in our lives. It is usually something that you know just HAD to be a God thing because there is just no way that was happening without Gods' help. God puts these examples of how He works in our lives out there so that we can turn to them to remind us that He IS working in our lives. And that He IS "all powerful". When we are going through the rough times, hopefully before we have been taken in by Satan's lies, we need to reach out and grab onto the vivid reminders of how God has already worked the impossible in our lives.

   God isn't gonna keep Satan from coming after you. Satan came after Jesus. What did Jesus do? He turned to the Word of God. He quoted it back to Satan and ordered him to be gone. We have been given the power and authority to do the very same thing. We have been given the Word of God. We need to study it now and know it. One so that we can use it to defeat Satan, but also because if we REALLY KNOW IT we can not be fooled when Satan tries to twist it into something that it is not. And we need to be able to recognize how God works in our lives. Remember the things He has done. Remember how awesome it was to see how He worked in your life. And realize that He has not left you behind.

   Now when it seems like the world is falling apart around me I try to really think on God's Word, and on the miracles that He has worked in my life. I know that He would not have invested that much in me just to let me go... I then start to evaluate my life to see if there are any strongholds that I have not given up to Him. I am quite sure that there are always some strongholds at any one time... as I am only human. But I ask God to show me if there is anything that He want's me to work on. And I pray. I don't pray that God fixes it, but I guess it wouldn't hurt... I do however pray that God be my center. That I can keep my eyes and my thoughts on Him as I go this trial rather than on myself... not an easy task. And I am not always very good at it. You probably know exactly what I'm saying, huh?

   Dear Lord, please don't let my friends and I be fooled by Satan's cruel games. Please help us to keep our eyes and our minds focused on you as we go through our trials. Please bring to mind scriptures that will help us to fight the urge to give in... and please help us to give our problems to You and to really give them to You and to be able to rest in Your peace as we allow You to take the driver's seat in our lives and steer us back to where we need to be.

What, no books in the schools?

2010-01-01T08:00:00.002-05:00

"Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth." 2 Timothy 2:15

I was reading online recently about a boarding school in New England that has gotten rid of most of the books in their library and replaced them with electronic devices called "Kindles" that are like computerized books. Amazon.com sells the Kindles and the books which can be downloaded to the devices and then read. Amazon has about 366,000 titles at the moment and their library is growing.

This made me think about the Bible. I have 2 electronic versions of the bible loaded onto my Ipod and I used them at church and at bible study. It's much easier to carry the Ipod around than lugging a big book. When doing actual study time I use an online site called biblegateway.com to do research because I can check the verse in every version without much trouble.

I find the electronic devices easier to read than a book because as I have gotten older the eyesight has deteriorated quite a bit. I like the backlit screens that are easier to see and being able to increase the font size helps immensely. Much easier than squinting at a page. But yet... when I am sitting at home and I just want to experience the comfort of read the bible, I am still much more likely to pull out the old bible I started with in College (the one with the highlighted pages, with notes written all around the borders...) You know the one, you probably have one just like it at home. There is just something about actually holding and looking at the real bible when you just want to soak in God's word.

I am a true computer geek, but yet I worry about taking the books out of the schools and the libraries. I can't imagine what it would be like if children never picked up a real book to read. No flipping the pages. No feeling the weight of a good story. Not even the sound of the book hitting the desk to get someone's attention. (Though I imagine if you drop a "Kindle" you will get someone's attention.)

If we allow our schools to do away with real books they will be gone forever, even the classics. If this happens we will be dependent on purchasing them from an online company. We will be limited to the "profitable" titles rather than an entire library full of titles. And how will we ever be able to keep up with technology. Technology changes every few years. The books that you download now probably won't work in 5 or 10 years, but that hardback book on your shelf will still be readable. I have heard of family's that have passed Bibles down for generations, even with histories and family trees inside. (Mine was not one of them.) I want to see the books stay on the shelves. I want to see the children reading them. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to teach the young people in our lives the value of reading. Help us to share with them the joy of picking up an old book and just holding it in our hands and reading it page by page. Please help my friends to share the joy of looking through highlighted notes and words of wisdom jotted in the borders of their bibles. That would be totally lost if we had to rely solely on electronic books. Thank you Lord, for providing the word and please help us to protect it and pass it on to the young people in our lives.

A Christmas Thought

2009-12-25T08:00:00.002-05:00

"After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem and asked, "Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star in the east and have come to worship him." Matthew 2:1-2

   I am sitting in my comfortable chair beholding the beauty of my first Christmas tree in over twenty years. A white tree with white lights. Just awesome. I am reminded of that first Christmas when the three wise men followed the star to find the baby Jesus. And as I reflect on my thoughts and feelings in regards to Christmas I realize that I have been wrong for years.

   I have always maintained that Christmas is NOT about the gifts. But this year I have come to realize that I have been wrong. My Pastor said it best... he said that Christmas IS really all about the gift... let's take a look.

   Christmas is the celebration of the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ who came to Earth to give us life. He was a "gift" to us from God. Jesus' entire life and death was a gift. His birth meant that He was here. His death on the cross was so that we would not have to die for own sins. His life was full of teachings on, and examples of how God wants for us to live our lives. Each of these teachings and life examples was in itself a "gift".

   I have been given the gift this year of being able to celebrate my love for God and my appreciation of the Gifts that God has given to me. It is truly not lost on me. I heard a song on the radio the other day... "Go tell it on the mountain, Over the hills and everywhere, Go tell it on the mountain, our Jesus Christ is born..." That was one of the first songs I remember learning as a child... I learned it at a church next door to where I lived when I was about five years old... I used to sneak over and go to Sunday school with the other kids in the neighborhood. And now that song has come to life with new meaning for me... I want to go tell it everywhere.... That Jesus Christ was born, lived, and died for you, for me, for everyone...

   God's gifts. That is what Christmas is all about. God loved us so much that he has given us a gift so special that we really truly don't deserve. But He want's us to have it anyway... We give gifts to family and friends at Christmas as a representation of the gifts that God has given us... It doesn't matter what we give each other... It is the joy one gets from giving something to someone they care about. It's not about that gift, it's about what is behind the gift. It's about love. We love others as God has first loved us. We give gifts representative of the gifts of love that God has given us... Our gifts can in no way compare to the gifts that God has given us... but let us be reminded this year with each gift we open, of the Real Christmas Gift. The Gift of Life as given to us when God sent His Son to take away our sins and give us everlasting life.

   Have a Merry Christmas folks, and be safe. I am thankful for each and every one of you. Each of you has been a gift from God in my life at some time throughout the year.

   Dear Lord, please bless my friends and the others who might stumble upon this blog. Please show them, as You have shown me, that You are there, that You are working in their lives, even when they don't think You're there. And that You love them so much that You were willing to give up so much just to make them one of Yours. And please help us to keep Christ in Christmas, as a reminder of Your awesome love for us. Thank You. You Rock!!!!!

God and Football?

2009-12-18T08:01:00.001-05:00

"...I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ." Phil. 3:8

   Don't you just love the Steelers? Or the Buckeyes? Or whatever team plays for the city in which you live or the college you went to? Do you wear your teams colors proudly on game days. Does you car bear a window sticker or bumper sticker that tells the world how proud you are to be a fan of your favorite team? Have you ever made a road trip to see them play? Do you plan your Sunday afternoons and Monday evenings around what time the game is on, and whether or not your team is playing?

   Now let me ask you another question. Do you love God MORE THAN you love your favorite football team. Do you even love God AS MUCH AS you love your favorite football team? Do you really? Are you ready to proudly announce to the world that you love God more than you love your favorite team. That you put Him first before everything else in your life? Our love for God should be stronger than our love for anything else in life. If it is not, then we have our priorities wrong. If I loved the Steelers (for example) more than I loved God then it would be as if I had made the Steelers my God rather than God. We should be more excited at the opportunity to spend time with God than we would be to spend time with someone like Ben Roethlisburger or Troy Polamalu.

   I do love my Steelers. But I love my God more. I wear the black and gold proudly on game days. But I wear the armour of God daily. I talk to the Steelers once a week (they can't really hear me as I am actually only shouting at the TV during the game) but I talk to God several times a day. Every Day. What do you do? Who do you love more? It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help me and my friends to keep our priorities right and to keep You first in our lives. Sometimes it can be very hard to do and we can't do it without Your help. Please remind us each time we watch our favorite teams play, that as much as we love them, we should love You even more. And please help us to do just that.

A Smile and a Good Word...

2009-12-11T08:04:00.004-05:00

"A cheerful look brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones." Proverbs 15:30

It all starts with a smile. I stop at McDonalds every morning on the way to work and pick up an unsweetened iced tea to get me through the day. There are 3 paths I can take to work, but I usually stick to one because I like that McDonalds best of all. The reason that I enjoy going there is that the people who work the drive through are so nice. They smile, and are cheerful as they say "good morning". I like them. When I see them I can't help but think to myself "I want to get me some of that..." It lifts my heart to see happy people so early in the day. I am not much of a people person, and I am definitely not an early morning person. Sometimes (quite often actually) I don't even think about smiling or saying "good morning" to people because I am just so wrapped up in what i am doing. I'm not much of a smiler. But this morning it hit me. I realized that I become more cheerful because someone else took the time to smile at me. It really made me wonder. if God wants us to love others then shouldn't we be sharing that love? Doesn't a smile express a kind and caring heart? Does it hurt to smile? No. Does it take some thought? For some of us, yes it does. Would it be a good thing to try? Yeah, I guess it would.

If we are supposed to let our light shine instead of hiding it under a bushel, then being bright and cheerful must be a good thing. People are into feelings. Everyone wants to feel wanted. If smiling at someone and saying a cheerful "good morning" is all it takes to brighten up someone's morning then wouldn't that be a nice thing to do? And if they get used to seeing you like that wouldn't they be more likely to get into a conversation with you? And wouldn't that be a great opportunity to share with them about Jesus being the real light? And if they see that Jesus is the reason for your light shining, wouldn't they just naturally "want some of that"? So it really does all start with a smile. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, Please help me and my friends to be more people friendly. Help us to remember to smile more and to offer up a cheerful "good morning" to folks we run into. Let Jesus' light shine brighter through our lives and how we treat others. And may God use us to make others say to themselves... "I want to get me some of that"...

The real meaning of Christmas

2009-12-04T08:00:00.002-05:00

"The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel" which means, "God with us." Luke 1:23
Christmas is special. It is also a very difficult time for many people. In the past I too have struggled mightily at Christmas time even though I really appreciate the holiday season.
I was not raised within the church. As a child I can remember baking cookies with my mom, and singing a few simple Christmas Carols. Going out and picking a tree and making the decorations from whatever was available in the house. By the time I was 6 or 7 my dad had endured as much of Christmas as he could take and from that point on there was no more Christmas in our house.
I don't know most of the Christmas Carols that people grew up singing. I don't have any Holiday traditions. I don't even have a traditional Christmas dinner story to share with friends. But I do have a lot to celebrate at Christmas. Especially this year. I am celebrating that I CAN celebrate the birth of my Lord. Something I have missed for the past 20 years or so... and it means so much more this year than ever before. God is with us. He sent His son to live the life of a man so that we could have a human example of how we too should live. He suffered for our sake. He died for our sins. He rose to be with the father and to wait for us to join Him. How much more can we want than that.
This Christmas Eve I intend to read the story of Jesus' birth. And then to reflect on what it means to me. Christmas is personal. A time of remembrance, reflection and celebration. I will celebrate my life. My life in Christ. For without His sacrifice there can be no life. This Christmas there will be no sneaking out to go to Church. There will be no hiding in my room to read the Bible. There will be songs of joy playing on the ipod. I will sit before the lit tree and read of Jesus' birth. What a joy. What an honor to be able to celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus without having to be afraid of someone seeing you celebrate it.
Christmas is not about presents and big fancy dinners and dressing up. It is about remembering that all we have is ours because God gave us His Son. Because God loved us so much that He was willing to give up so much. We give gifts to our friends and family as a reminder of the gift that God gave us. We sing songs of joy that Jesus was born to save all of us.
I am reminded that there are many others out there who want to be able to celebrate the birth of our Lord, but for whatever reason can not celebrate it in public. I will be praying for them. And celebrating their love for God. Thankful that they know in their hearts that Jesus is the reason for the season.... It's got to make you wonder....
Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to be thankful for what we have, and to realize that all that we have is Your gift to us. Please help us to remember those who love you and can not openly express that love for You. Please help those who don't know You to see how You have worked in our lives and help them to "want some of that". Please help us to not conform to the ideas of the world as we enter this holiday season, but rather help us to remember that Jesus is the reason for the season...

Thanksgiving Thoughts

2009-11-26T08:00:00.000-05:00

"Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged." Colossians 3:18-21

Did you watch much television as a child? I did. I can remember watching programs like "Ozzie and Harriet", "The Patty Duke Show", and "Leave It To Beaver". I guess that "Ozzie and Harriet" was probably my very favorite program. I knew that they were a real family and so I thought that they were typical of all families.

Growing up I wondered why my family couldn't be more like that. I thought my family to be lacking. I wanted my family to be more like the television families that I watched each week. But they weren't. I wasted many a year hoping for changes that I could not bring. I did try. It just didn't work. As I grew I learned that television was make believe, and that even the Nelson's weren't really as happy as the family they portrayed on their show. There was no "happy family". But I looked at my classmates, and later at my co-workers and saw people who wanted to spend time with their families. They enjoyed being with each other. It was kind of cool, but totally new to me. I had spent most of my adult life running from my family.

At age 30 I had to move back my hometown to help my mother who had been confined to a wheelchair following some back surgery. I never left. For 20 years I stayed with them and helped out around the house, but inside, I was aching to be free from there. We weren't a close family and there was no love lost when I moved out. But God works. In some mighty strange ways. Not that His ways are strange, but that they are strange to us because we are of the world. At the time I left my parents home, I felt God was calling me to go. My mother, feeling abandoned, told me she was disowning me. "Never come back" she said. I was devastated. I was upset to be told not to go back to a place where I had not wanted to be... go figure...

But God is just so amazing. Over time He worked... on my mother... on me... on other members of my family.... I listened to Him. I tried to be there to support my family even though they didn't want me there... eventually God softened their hearts so that they invited me back into their lives. He softened my heart so that for the first time I actually wanted to be there... Everyone in my family noticed the difference and we didn't even have to say a word.

This year I am spending the Thanksgiving Holiday with my family. I am really looking forward to it. This will possibly be the last time that we are all there together as my father's health has been going downhill pretty steadily. But God's timing is so perfect that it is only by His grace that we are able to have this time together. I think that it will probably be our happiest Thanksgiving ever. And for the first time, we will all be thankful for it. Praise be to God. Nothing is impossible if it is His will. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please use this example of how You have worked in my life to give someone hope where maybe they have given up. I have seen you do the impossible. Please let my friends know that You are there. You are real. And if You want something to happen, it will. Please impress upon them the importance of being in Your word. Of taking the time to listen for Your direction in their lives. And give them the confidence to realize it is You, and to do as You have directed. Please bless my friends as You have blessed me. Thank You Lord, Thank You...

His Grace Is Enough

2009-11-20T08:00:00.015-05:00

"The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit, brothers. Amen." Galatians 6:18

As we move into the Thanksgiving season; I find myself constantly humming the song "Your Grace Is Enough". I am reminded of all of the things that I have to be grateful for this year. Only this year is different from the others. This year I know that I know that I know that everything that I have has come by the grace of God.

I will be (God willing) traveling to Philadelphia next week to spend the holiday with my family. We tried this last year and it was a near disaster. At the time, I promised myself that I would never do that again. But God has the ability to make things right. He alone has the power to heal broken relationships that you and I could never do on our own. This year I joyfully look forward to the trip, hopeful that it will be a time of family togetherness like we have never experienced before.

Thinking back, I realize that just six months ago I was afraid of my father, and now I am afraid for him. My mother had disowned me, and now invites me to spend more time with her. My sister wouldn't even speak to me, we now exchange emails and recently we went out for a cup of coffee together. My other sisters now end their telephone calls by saying "I love you". Had you asked me six months ago... I would have said "No way! That is just impossible. It could never happen!". But alas God is good. Very good. That does not mean that everything is "hunky dory" but it is so much better than I could have ever hoped for that I am indeed very very grateful. And I realize that it is only by God's grace that it is possible. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please use the example how Your grace has worked in my life to show my friends just how much You love us. This story is not so much about me and my life as it is about how You have showered me with Your grace and Your love. Please help me and my friends to continue to give You our problems and to let You take care of them as only You can do. And help us to realize that "Your grace is enough..."

"Let God and Let Go..."

2009-11-13T08:05:00.006-05:00

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6.

Do you speak Christianese? My Pastor says that most people who were raised up in the church speak a special language called Christianese. It consists of sayings like "Saved by the blood of the lamb" and "Filled with the Holy Spirit". He reminded us recently that when talking with those who weren't raised in the church that we might want to consider NOT using Christianese. Having not been raised in the church myself, I thought that was an excellent piece of advice.

I was not raised in the church. My family didn't even believe in God. As a child, I snuck out to go to church when I could and I had gone to church off and on for many years as an adult. But with no regularity, and with no real "teaching". I definately did not speak "Christianese". I can speak "Christianese" to a degree; but even today, I still find many terms difficult to grasp and understand.

At one point, not that long ago, I was in the midst of struggling with a lifetime of hurts and problems. I had been trying to learn to deal with them, and had asked God to help. My friends in the church kept telling me to "Let God and Let Go..." I had no idea what they were talking about. It wasn't until many months later, having taken the time to really listen to what God was telling me rather than what my friends were saying, that I began to understand the meaning of "Let God and Let Go".

Everyone has pains and struggles. We ask God to take them away. God doesn't want us to suffer. We are His children after all. But just as we sometimes have to let our children make mistakes and suffer the consequences, so He too sometimes lets us go through hard times in order to learn a valuable lesson. Sometimes we suffer at the hands of others. We didn't necessarily "do something wrong" and we aren't necessarily the ones who will need to learn something. But sometimes God allows us to suffer so that someone else might learn from it. Sometimes in our suffering, others will be moved by our faith in God, not so much by what we say and do, but maybe by what we don't say or do...

I held onto my lifetime of pain. I kept it close to my heart. I didn't share it... but at one point God made it clear to me that it was time to share it... I began to slowly share with a few trusted friends. I didn't really understand at that time how God worked. I tried to give my burden to my friends, hoping that they would take the pain away. But they are only human and they have their own burdens to bear. They kept saying "Let Go and Let God..." and I didn't understand...

Months later a very dear friend came to me and said that they could no longer help me to bear my burden because it was just too much for them, They told me that I must give it to God and let Him take it. I still didn't understand. I had been praying for God to take my pain away. But what I didn't realize at the time was that I was offering it to God, and then very quickly pulling it right back close to my heart. I was not really "giving" it to Him at all.

Kind of like how my nephew Joey once had a toy that he didn't play with anymore. When another child picked up the toy and began to play with it, Joey ran over pushed the child to the ground, yanked the toy from the child's hand and placed it back in the toy box. Joey didn't want the toy. But he was not ready to give it up yet.

We hold onto our pain. We want to let it go but we still hold it close to our hearts. "Letting God and Letting Go" means that we actually GIVE our pain and suffering to God and we really let Him take it away. When we are willing to do that. To really let go of the pain. God WILL take it away. He will fill the part of you that is hurting with His love. It will still take some time to heal. But it WILL HEAL. One day you will realize that God DID take the pain away.

It took me a long time to learn the meaning of the phrase "Let Go and Let God". So now I am inclined to speak to others in much simpler language. To explain things in a way that they can understand. To only use "Christianese" with those who "speak the language" and to be more aware of whom I am talking to. Using terms that people don't understand, can be a stumbling block. It can delay the very thing you are hoping and praying for in a new Christian... My relationship with my dear friend suffered because I tried to unload my problems on them. I am thankful for their good advice now, but got frustrated and upset with them at the time because I just didn't understand. But God is so great. All powerful. And able to handle all of our problems. He handled my problems once I actually let Him have them. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to be more aware of the background of the people with whom we share your love. Help us to speak to them in ways that they will be able to understand and relate to. Guide our thoughts and our tongues as we deal with others on a daily basis. And thank you for your insight and wisdom, and for always being there for us.

God and the Verizon Guy

2009-11-06T08:05:00.012-05:00

"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. " Jeremiah 29: 12-13

I was watching television the other day and the Verizon commercial came on. You know the one. The geeky Verizon Guy saying "Can you hear me now?" Yep. That's the one. Anyway, I was watching the commercial when suddenly I realized that the Verizon guy reminded me of God. Yeah right, you say, but wait... The Verizon guy seems to be everywhere and he is always asking "Can you hear me now?" And he is surrounded by an army of people who follow him and are there to help you to hear him better. Who else do we know like that.... Yeah, now you're thinking... God is always around. He talks to us all the time. He has an army of people who follow Him who are there to support us as we try to hear Him better.

The bible says that if we really seek God we will find Him. Think about it. Lots of people talk to God, or at least ask Him questions. Especially people who don't even really believe that He is out there. Something bad happens and they ask "why?" but they never seem to really listen for an answer. The bible says that if they would choose to really listen, that they would hear the answer. When we take time to be with God we call it quiet time. But a lot of the time we use that time to talk to God. Do we take the time to sit back and listen? Don't we usually hear the answers to our questions or at least some direction for our lives if we wait and listen for it? Yes. God speaks to us when we quiet down and listen for His voice. The voice is soft, sometimes it is very hard to hear. But it IS there, and when we hear it, we know we have heard it. Sometimes it is about us, but often it is not.

God sometimes guides us to pray for a certain person or situation. Sometimes He instructs us to do something that we hadn't even considered as an option or He may ask us to avoid something that we had planned to do. We need to quiet down our lives and our minds and spend some serious time just listening for whatever God wants to tell us. And if we aren't sure, we can run it by one of the "soldiers from the army of God", our sisters and brothers in the Lord, and they can help us to discern the validity of the message. That is one of the benefits of good fellowship.

So now having thought about it a bit, can't you also see how the Verizon guy is a reminder of how God is always there for us. And now won't the commercials be a reminder to really quiet down and listen for the "still small voice of God" in our lives. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to spend more time listening for Your voice and help us to recognize the voice as Yours. I pray that we seek You with everything that we are and that as the bible says You will make Yourself known to us... And please help those family members and friends who don't really believe that You are there, help them to actually listen for You when they are asking You the "why" questions. Let them seek You, and listen for Your voice, and may it make a difference in their lives as it has in ours.

He's in the small stuff...

2009-10-30T08:05:00.005-04:00

"...Never will I leave you, nore will I forsake you." Hebrews 13:5

Do you ever feel like you're all alone in this world. Did you ever wonder if God is really there with you? The Bible tells us that God will never leave us, yet sometimes we just can't seem to find Him. Faith, my friend. When we hit the dark times, we tend to look inward at ourselves. It becomes very difficult to see what is going on around you when your eyes are on you. Kind of like driving a car while you read a book. Doesn't really work so well, and if you keep it up, a crash is imminent.

When things are bad and we feel all alone, we really need to take our eyes off of ourselves and put them where they really belong. On God. But then you ask, where do I look to see God. The anwer is all around you. Look at the trees, the flowers, your children or grandchildren. Look at the clouds in the sky. Check out that nice car in the driveway... Oh it's yours? Yes it is, but provided by God. If your like me, music can can be a way to be closer to God. Sometimes it is like the words are coming directly from Him. They will speak wonders to you if you listen.

But the best place to see God is in the Bible. Read it daily. Ask Him to speak to you and show you something new each day. It is amazingly simple, but it works. God will show you something new even in verses you have read hundreds of times before, if you let Him. God is always there with us... sometimes I think He hides so that we have to seek Him. But even so, he has never left us... He always has us in His sights. We just don't always see Him... it's gotta make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to see You working in our lives during the hard times as much as we see you during the good times. Please help us to see you in the little things, and to recognize the little things as "hugs from You"...

You Have a Gift...

2009-10-23T08:12:00.007-04:00

"There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord." 1 Corinthians 12: 4-5

I went to a women's retreat this past weekend. The theme running throughout the weekend was "Gifts". There was discussion on what are the "gifts", where do they come from, how do you know what your gift is and "how do you use them to serve God. This was a very timely message for me as I had been pondering the subject quite a bit lately.

God has gifts for all of His children. Each "gift" is unique to the individual. Oh yes, there are only a limited amount of types of gifts, but our ability to use the gifts and the situations that God puts us into where we could use them are definately unique to each of us. One of the speakers this weekend was a worship leader at a very large Vineyard Church. She was telling us that while she loves leading worship, and serves God by leading it, she feels that it was not her most precious 'gift". God gave her the ability to sing and play the piano and she gets up each week and leads thousands of people in worship, and knows that she is serving our God by doing so, but she believes that raising her children in the way of the Lord is her most very special gift. This woman looks at each of her children as gifts from God, and sees raising them up in the Lord as a gift to the children and to God. I found that to be the most profoundly moving truth of the weekend.

God does not limit us to just one "gift". Often times we get several gifts. God will design a gift package for each of us that will allow us to serve Him and His Kingdom in the best way possible if we are open to it. It really boils down to whether or not we seek Him, and whether or not we listen for the "still quiet voice" of the Holy Spirit inside of us. The gifts are there. Freely given. We only need to ask Him to reveal them to us, and sit back and listen to what He tells us. Often times we can recognize our gifts by our passion. A gifted speaker will usually have a passion for speaking. A gifted musician will have a passion for music. A gifted teacher will garner great joy from seeing students "get the point".

Ask God to make clear your gifts, and then sit back and wait for him to show you. When He does you will know it, and you will have an immense desire to use the gift to worship, honor and serve Him. It won't be about you at all. It will flow from your very being without effort. And you will know. It might not be just one gift, it may be several. We are to serve God in everything we do, to give praise always. Our gifts help us to do just that. Practice using your gifts to honor God and you will soon find that God will use your gifts to bless those around you too. It's gotta make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to discover Your giftings in our lives. Help us to use these gifts to honor and serve you. And somewhere along the way, please allow those gifts to bless those people with whom we come into contact. And may Your light shine brighter because of our willingness to listen to You.

Where Did You Come From?

2009-10-16T10:47:00.002-04:00

"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me." Revelation 3:19-21

Not all of us have been brought up in Christian homes but here we are... Christians in spite of our auspicious upbringings. In fact it doesn't really matter what type of family we were born into... If God wants us, he will call us and keep on calling until we finally buckle down and listen. Did you ever wonder how and why all those people in China are sneaking around trying to learn God's word. Was it just because someone said "Hey God loves you and He wants to know you"? No. Lots of people have had that shared and they don't go desperately seeking God... It is because God had put the desire in their hearts long before they ever heard the Word. The Word was an inspiration, a confirmation that the still small voice inside them was right. Did they need to have the message shared? Of course they did. But if the Word had not come to them, they still would have had the desire to know God.

I was raised in a household that did not believe that God was there or that He sent His Son as a sacrifice of love, and yet I had the desire. Not from anything that I did. I had no control. God called. I heard the still quiet voice inside me. One day someone shared the Word. And it set me free. I knocked on the door and God answered, welcoming me into His home and His family.

Remember me, remember my story, remember the people in China sneaking around trying to learn God's will for their lives. Share the Word with others every chance you get. You might think it doesn't matter, but it might release the small tiny voice inside the person with whom you are sharing. It's got to make you wonder...

Dear Lord, please help my friends and I to find opportunities and the courage to go out and share your love with others. Help us to be a light where there might be no other, and let us shine because You are bright within our hearts... And most of all please help us to hear the "still small voice" inside us and to recognize it as Yours....

Dealing with losses...

2009-10-09T10:55:00.001-04:00

"For I know the plans I have for you," Declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" Jeremiah 29:11

At one time or another each of us has faced a loss that has seemed to much to bear. Whether it be the loss of a loved one, a friend, coworker or something more intangible like our health, eyesight or hearing.... it is always something. We can keep looking inward, thinking about that which we have lost or we can look outside of ourselves. If we have faith in God's ability to "handle" our situations we can rest in the peace that He is in the driver's seat. God can see the bigger picture that we can only see a small portion of... Kind of like how we can see the previews of next week's show but only the producer knows the ending... God is like the "producer" of our lives. If we look outside of ourselves and open up our hearts and minds to what He has opened up to us we will see the beauty of what He has made to give us joy. We will see the color's of the leaves, the blueness of the skies, the beauty of the children waiting for the bus stop, the love that an elderly couple have for each other as they stroll along the side of the road hand in hand... We can enjoy the music on the radio or CD. There is so much out there that God has created or was the power behind the creation of that is there for us to enjoy. It should all remind us that He sees the bigger picture, that He alone has control. We can take in all of these reminders that He is in the driver's seat and we can let go of the steering wheel and quit trying to "drive" our lives... God has taken away the person whom we cared so much for because in the big scheme of things it was the right time. It's not the end. We WILL see them again. God told us in Jeremiah that He is in control. That He has plans for us. Don't we owe it to Him to let Him do what He intended instead of trying to "handle" things ourselves. He will take good care of us. Do what is best for us... at the right time.... always the right time....just be patient and let Him work... kind of makes you wonder, doesn't it?

Dear Lord, please give my friends your peace as they work through their losses. Let them see You in the small stuff. Let them be still and know You are there... Help them to take a seat in the back and leave the driving to You...